2am Thoughts

by Makenzie Campbell

Life is to be lived— To experience adventure. To travel the world. To learn exciting things. And it is too short to not.

Do not let the dust collect in your soul. Live a life so fulfilling that it will never have enough time to do so.

You are possibly the most beautiful and intricate human being I have ever met.

I want your heart. I want the rhythm of my heart to align with the drumming of yours. I want you and I to not be you and I. I want you and I to be us.

Through all the darkness surrounding me, you somehow found a way to shed light.

Some songs seem to have people attached to them.

Maybe we are meant to be together. Maybe you are meant to tell me you love me. Maybe when our worlds collided we were not meant to build our lives as separate people, but combine and build together.

One day you too will have stopped searching strangers’ eyes for companionship. You won’t lie in a cold bed with nothing but dark thoughts to warm you. You will not order a pizza for yourself in your empty apartment. One day you will have found your person. The one human being on this earth designed for you. The one that eases the pain in your heart and reminds you of why you are here. Why none of the other relationships worked. Why you had to go through heartache after heartache. And you will be thankful for all that pain because it now has brought so much happiness. You will look into your lover’s eyes and feel something none of the others have made you feel. You will look into their eyes and realize they are the only ones you want to look into for the rest of your life. You will no longer feel alone.

You are a map of every destination I want to discover.

I am hopelessly enthralled by your simple existence.

Your eyes are the sunrises and sunsets of my days.

You kissed all the bruises and cuts my thoughts had scraped upon my heart. You healed my wounds entirely. You defeated my biggest fear. Now every time I look at you I remember that miserable young girl and how she was so completely wrong. I am forever grateful for your love – the love that silenced my demons and calms the eternal storm taking place inside me.

When I’m with you I have all these words inside me ready to paint the world, but when they emerge, they are black and white because the colors get caught in my throat.

Love is something absolutely beautiful. Yes, it may tear me apart and make me vulnerable as hell but it also is one of the only things in life worth living for. Love allowed me to find someone who accepted me for my differences and embraced me for who I was. Someone to hold my hand when my world was falling apart and tell me “everything is going to be alright.” Yes, love killed me when I got left behind or forgotten, but I have to remember the times it ignited our hearts with fiery flames and allowed us to burn together.

You came to teach me how to tend my own garden rather than helplessly wait for someone else to do so.

There will come a point where everything falls into place. Everything makes sense. Why this didn’t happen, why that did. Every past experience, moment, and memory is just that: in the past. And you won’t look back. You’ll be too busy living in the present world enjoying your beautiful life without hesitations or fear of anything. You’ll catch yourself smiling for no apparent reason except the realization that this is your life and you are here for it.