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Vanessa leaned forward, her eyes locked on Mel’s. “And I’ve seen the way you look at me.”
A soft gasp escaped Mel’s lips. The sound of the impact surprised her. And it set off a spark somewhere deep inside of her. Vanessa’s lips curved up almost imperceptibly. “Here.” She held the whip out toward Mel, balancing it on her palms. “Hold it.”
Vanessa pushed her thigh firmly between Mel’s legs, stoking the fire deep inside her.
Mel’s breath quickened. The hungry look on Vanessa’s face made Mel feel like her prey.
But bound as she was, she could do nothing but lay there. Bound as she was, she was powerless to stop Vanessa. But stopping Vanessa was the last thing she wanted.
“Being submissive in bed has nothing to do with who you are out in the world. And submission does not equal weakness. In fact, it takes a great deal of strength to do this.”
“It does take strength to do this, Melanie. Putting yourself in someone else’s hands. Making yourself vulnerable to them. Trusting them with your everything. You are anything but weak.” Vanessa kissed Mel gently on the lips. “And you should never, ever be ashamed of your desires.”
“We need to be responsible. I’m not going to just tie you up and flog you without any prior discussion.”
“In all seriousness, you need to know what we’re getting into. BDSM can be risky. Physically, mentally, emotionally. So it’s essential that we communicate. About boundaries, consent, limits, and a whole host of other things. You already have a safe word. That’s a start. But do you know what your hard limits are? The things that you won’t do under any circumstances?”
What I do gives me complete power over another person in the most intimate of ways. I become her Master, her whole world. Her everything.”
“All those fantasies you told me about? I’m going to grant them, and so much more. I’ll show you how good it feels to relinquish control. I’ll take you to heights of pleasure that you’ve only dreamed of. I’ll show you the sweet oblivion that comes with total submission.”
As Vanessa’s fingers stroked faster under the bar, she found that she didn’t care.
“So, Melanie,” Vanessa said. “Have you been following my rule?”
“That must have been agonizing.” Vanessa slid a hand underneath Mel’s coat and up the inside of her thigh.
“Good. Remember, using your safe word isn’t a sign of weakness. When you need to use it, use it.”
“The most important part of all of this is trust. You, trusting that I will keep you safe. And me trusting you to communicate honestly about your limits and what you’re thinking and feeling. Do you promise to do that for me?”
There was a challenge in Vanessa’s voice that Mel didn’t dare to test.
Every stroke brings you closer and closer to an elevated state of awareness.” She leaned in and whispered into Mel’s ear. “And tonight, I’m going to take you all the way there.”
“How are you doing, Melanie?”
It was all so delicious. The piercing kiss of the crop. The thrill of not knowing when the whip would fall. The adrenaline coursing through her body. The experience threatened to overwhelm her.
“That, Melanie, was subspace.” Vanessa rolled over to face Mel. “It’s a natural high, a rush of adrenaline and endorphins triggered by all the sensations that your body was experiencing. At least, that’s the physical side. There’s far more to subspace than that. Or so I’m told.”
Mel purred. She liked that tender, sweet side of Vanessa. She wondered how often Vanessa let anyone see it. She closed her eyes. This was by far the best part of her night.
Was Vanessa going to leave her now? And why did that suddenly bother her so much?
Vanessa kissed Mel gently on the lips. “Don’t be so hard on yourself. You don’t have to be strong all the time.”
“You don’t need to thank me,” Vanessa said quietly. “I would do anything to keep you from hurting.”
“I’m glad.” She paused. “I didn’t want to leave you alone after last night, but I couldn’t get out of this meeting.”
“As soon as you hang up, I want you to have breakfast. And drink plenty of water. Your body needs to replenish itself after last night.”
The warm, affectionate Vanessa of last night was gone. But she wasn’t back to being cool and inscrutable. It was something in between. It made Mel wonder—how much of Vanessa’s hard, emotionless persona was an act, and how much of it was actually her?
“Right. You just have an intense connection with her, you’re exclusively seeing each other, and now you’re going crazy because she hasn’t texted you in a few days.”
They were more attuned to each other somehow, more connected. It was subtle but unmistakable.
“I promise you. I’m going to make your birthday unforgettable. You’ll love it.”
She pushed Mel down by the shoulders, straddled her body and pinned her wrists above her head. “I think you need a reminder of who you belong to.”
Vanessa became very interested in you. She kept asking me questions about you, and would conveniently only come in on nights when you were working. And then she started sneaking you up to her room above The Lounge late at night.”
And since then, she hasn’t let anyone get close to her.” He took a swig of his drink. “Except for you.”
Mel appreciated being able to spend some one-on-one time with Vanessa that didn’t involve Mel getting tied to something. Not that she minded that part. But it was a welcome change of pace.
“Why do you do that?” Vanessa asked. “Do what?” “Dismiss your feelings. Pretend that they aren’t important.”
“I’m not…” Mel sighed. “It’s a habit, I guess. When I was growing up, having any feelings at all was a weakness I could never afford to indulge in. I always felt like I had to be strong all the time because I had no one else I could rely on.”
We’re all hostages of our pasts.”
“I expected as much,” Vanessa said. “If it were up to me, you wouldn’t have to work another day in your life. I’d look after you in every way.”
“You would never allow that, would you? You should know, you’re the first woman who hasn’t simply let me do whatever the hell I want with you. Outside the bedroom, that is.” Vanessa lowered her voice. “You have no idea how infuriating it is. It only makes me want you even more.”
Mel blew out the candles and watched the sparklers burn down. “This is definitely the best birthday I’ve ever had.”
I called in another favor to get this room. It was worth it, just to see your smile.”
“Why is it so hard for you to accept things from others? Or to let them in? Do you think you don’t deserve love and happiness?”
“Melanie. Look at me.” Vanessa looked deep into Mel’s eyes. “You deserve the world. And you don’t have to go through life alone.”
Vanessa kissed her. Mel laid her head on Vanessa’s shoulder and they sat in silence, sinking into each other.
“I love seeing you in things that are mine.”
“It’s shibari. Japanese rope bondage. Some consider it an art,” Vanessa said. “You make a perfect canvas.”
“Don’t worry. I’m going to take it very, very slow. When I’m through with you, you’ll be more than ready for me.” Vanessa’s words sounded more like a threat than reassurance.
“I’m glad. Your happiness means a lot to me.” Mel’s heart fluttered at Vanessa’s words.
