Snow White Learns Witchcraft: Stories and Poems

by Theodora Goss

She watched her daughter grow up, made sure the girl could run and fight, because princesses need protecting, and sometimes princes are worse than useless.

read all the books I’ve never had the time for, and study witchcraft. What should women do when they grow old and useless? Become witches. It’s the only role you get to write yourself.

This is the way the story ends, she thinks. It ends. And then you get to write your own story.

In the room, surrounded by books and dust, I will take the box off the shelf and reclaim my heart as preordained.

“It is a truth universally acknowledged that judging a beauty contest between three goddesses causes nothing but trouble.”

“We seldom get what we want,” said Blanchefleur. “The world has a use for us, tasks we must fulfill. And we must fulfill them as best we can, finding happiness along the way. But we usually get what we need.”

How does one fall out of love with a thief who has already stolen one’s heart?

Wearing the wolf skin, she does not have to be herself anymore. She does not have to be Rose. She can be something else entirely: pain, longing, anger. She can be silence if she wants to. She can be the word “no.”

He tried very hard to be good, but kept falling in love, which is a disadvantage.

Fairy tales are another kind of Bible, for those who know how to read them.”

It was the first moment I chose courage over fear, and I have always made the same choice since.

In each of us there is a thief and a saint. The trouble of it is, we cannot part them.

Look, underneath, how beautiful you are…

So you decide there’s adventure out there somewhere, countries you have not heard of, seas that have not been sailed, another future than either the one reserved for serving-maids or princesses.

“Manipulating technology is no different from manipulating any other aspect of reality,”

How could you be expected to remember the locations of walls when you were contemplating the fundamental structure of reality?

“One of the most important things I learned in my time at Miss Lavender’s, which has served me well as a theoretical physicist, is to think like a witch. If you can’t find the answer, a witch would say, you’re probably asking the wrong question.”

“Don’t be nervous, but remember that she created the universe.”

“To a witch, any door is every door.” Senator Warren had said that, speaking at her graduation. It was probably supposed to be a metaphor, but metaphorical language was poetry, right? And poetry was magic.

“It’s very confusing, being all of yourself. You’ll find it quite uncomfortable for a while. But you’ll get used to it. We all do.”

I would like to write a poem comparing myself to a thunderstorm raging down the valleys, battering the rocks, flattening the willow trees. But today a raindrop could drown me.

Here are the things you know about the old woman: she milks the cows, she causes the apples to ripen, she teaches the birds their songs, she runs her fingers along the backs of the wild piglets to put the stripes on them. Here are the things she knows about you: everything, also your name.

Here is the moral: there are circumstances in which toads are as useful as diamonds. Or it may be, try not to get out of bed grumpy, especially when there are witches around. Or always be nice to old women, because you never know.