Unfortunately, if you’ve been made to feel foolish about your feelings, you may have learned to withdraw from people when you’re upset. You may brush off others’ sympathy by saying the equivalent of “I’m fine.” But withdrawing from comforting is very bad for you because you biologically need it. Normal human beings are soothed by touch and emotional connection with other people (Porges 2011). A caring person’s touch, voice tone, and proximity have a physically calming effect on us. Open yourself to this whenever you can. Don’t give the message that you can handle your distress without any
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