I understood how the bleakness can take a man. You feel it in the exhaustion that follows you around, that presses down like a weight just above your eyes, telling you to just sleep through it all. To blot out the world with dreams and closed eyes so that at least you don’t have to be aware of it. It tells you to be frantic, to elicit some kind of change to make things better, even as it tells you that there’s nothing you can do and no point in trying. It says you had something before, and that will never come back,
