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“Forgiveness is about a mind-set of letting go.” She thought for a second, then said, “It’s about acknowledging to yourself that someone hurt you, and accepting that.”
“Then it’s about accepting that the person who hurt you is flawed, like all people are, and letting that guide you to a better, more nuanced understanding of what happened.
“And then there’s a third part,” she went on, “probably the hardest, that involves trying to look at the aftermath of what happened and find ways that you benefited, not just ways you were harmed.”
When you are all about saying no, one yes is a big deal. It paves the way for other yesses to follow.
All my nervousness—gone. His presence in the room made everything okay.
It felt almost nostalgic, like remembering what it felt like to believe that the world was full of good things and good people and good luck. It tasted bittersweet, because it insisted there was so much to look forward to—even when I already knew there was far more to dread.
That’s the thing I always love best about the human race: how we pick ourselves back up over and over and just keep on going.
Ten years I’d simmered in my own self-righteousness, holding my grudge against her as if the only way to win was to stay mad the longest. As if there had ever been anything to win. As if you don’t always lose by definition when you push the people who love you away.
“That’s just the human condition, sweetheart. We’re always doomed to waste our time.”
Remember when I was all about trying to keep my life from getting destabilized?
I never even made a choice—or maybe I’d made the choice long before.
It’s amazing how brave you can be when you feel safe.
Yes, the world is full of unspeakable cruelty. But the answer wasn’t to never feel hope, or bliss, or love—but to savor every fleeting, precious second of those feelings when they came. The answer wasn’t to never love anyone. It was to love like crazy whenever you could.
So I kissed him back. And I made a choice to believe in that kiss.
