Life’s Amazing Secrets: How to Find Balance and Purpose in Your Life

by Gaur Gopal Das

Spirituality, in whatever genuine form of practice, brings purpose to our life and gives us a destination worth going to.

comprises four pieces: our spiritual practice (sadhana), the association that we keep (sanga), our character (sadachar) and our service to God and to others (seva). When all these aspects of the steering wheel are adhered to properly, they give us the ability to drive the car of our life towards its destination.

‘Happiness resides not in possessions, and not in gold, happiness dwells in the soul.’

When we comfort someone, it is easy to fall into their sorrowful energy, which can perpetuate their suffering. It’s important that we bring positive, non-judgemental energy into these conversations.

Having a friend to listen to your problems and discuss them with you is the beginning of finding a solution.

‘The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.’

‘The mind is what we use to perceive the world. We don’t see things as they are, we see things as we are.

‘I am not saying these problems don’t exist, but the real problem is that when negativity consumes the mind, not only do we lose the vision to see the beautiful things around us, but also the ability to solve the problems that confront us. We have to train our mind to focus on the positive and feel empowered to deal with the negative.’

when we think negatively of people, we should immediately counteract that energy by contemplating three positive qualities they have.

The mind is like the tongue. It drifts towards the negative areas of our life, making us restless and uneasy.

The mind neglects the thirty-one other ‘seed-free’ areas of life, choosing not to focus on the simple joys available to us.

This is not to say we shouldn’t deal with problems in our life. We need practical solutions too—interdental brushes are necessary. But we should not be consumed by them;

It is not just positivity we feel when we embrace gratitude. Better sleep, the ability to express more kindness, feeling more alive and even having a stronger immune system are all benefits of being thankful.

‘It’s not the happy people who are grateful; it’s the grateful people who are happy.

Those who are grateful are not immune to distress. However, gratitude on many different levels offered us unlikely solace in a time of great difficulty.’

We must have a positive state of mind when dealing with problems. Think: Is there anything positive about this situation I am in?

Being positive does not mean we neglect the negative. We must constructively deal with negative situations whilst simultaneously focusing on the positive.

Just like our tongue can be obsessed with something stuck in our teeth, our mind has a default setting to ...

Even in times of difficulty and sorrow, we can feel inner strength, when we are grateful for the support of caring friends and family.

we as a people have got busier over time. We tend to exclude parts of our lives which are not directly related to hard work and accumulating wealth.

writing a gratitude log daily, which is based on three principles of gratitude: recognize, remember and reciprocate.’

Spending time with our own mind in silence, without any gadgets to stimulate us and contemplating on who has helped us internalizes our gratitude.’

It is best to do this activity in the morning, because starting your day with gratitude will leave you feeling positive for the rest of the day.

Reflect on the last twenty-four hours and identify three to five people or situations that you are grateful for.

The daily description should consist of three to five people or things you are grateful for, and once every week, it should contain three to five action points to thank the people you are grateful for.

We must learn how to press pause and reflect on what we are grateful for. It is not good enough to say that we are too busy to be grateful.

The ways to start practising gratitude are: to recognise the good that has been done unto us and say ‘thank you’; to remember the good and mean it; and to reciprocate through actions of giving back and live by the same values.

Gratitude is not merely an emotion; it is a way of life which can be learnt and practised. We must prioritize the time to practise gratitude, and one of the many ways to do it is by writing a gratitude log daily.

When things are beyond your control and there is nothing you can do, why worry?

‘Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy.’ —Leo Buscaglia

Whether or not we can do something about it, our response should not be anxiety. Learning to detach ourselves from situations that are outside our control is an imperative skill to learn for personal growth. This is not to say I favour laziness—we should do everything in our power to try and rectify the situation, but after that, we have to take our attention away from the unpleasant circumstance.

what we see as bad at one point in time can turn out to be the best thing to happen to us.

Think: Is this in my control? If yes, you can do something about it. If no, then you cannot do anything about it. Therefore, in both circumstances, why worry?

we are spiritual beings having human experiences.

Connecting above ourselves means re-establishing our relationship with God,

There are many ways to connect to God. We may have our own, which is great, and we should go deeper into it. One of the most effective methods that has worked really well for me is mantra meditation.

‘This happens with all relationships, not just in marriages. If we are not proactive in our relationships, they start to seem dry and become cumbersome.

My golden rule to know whether or not you are being adequately sensitive to another person is: treat someone better than you would like to be treated. Ask yourself the question, ‘Does my tone of voice, body language and behaviour reflect sensitivity?’

‘Familiarity breeds contempt,’

‘When we are overly familiar with people, we forget how important they are to us and the correct way to behave with them.

When we treat inanimate objects, like buckets or our possessions, with disrespect or insensitivity, we will end up treating people the same.

when we treat our things badly, we might notice that insensitivity gradually creeping into our relationships with the people around us.’

In modern culture, it is common to use things once and throw them away. For example, plastic cups.

If we can have this mentality with our things, we may end up introducing disposability in our relationships as well.

There are many ways to perceive others. We should start choosing the one which magnifies the positive and avoids the negative.

‘Anyone can find the dirt in someone. Be the one that finds the gold.’

‘They are always looking for the nectar that flowers possess and avoid lingering where there is dirt. We should be like the bee—always seeing the best in people and choosing to avoid their faults.’

‘We live in a world of quick fixes.

But sadly, our relationships do not work that way. They follow the same principle as growing a plant: constant care is required so that one day, it blooms.

‘Watch your thoughts, they turn into words. Watch your words, they turn into actions. Watch your actions, they turn into habits. Watch your habits, they turn into character. Watch your character, it turns into your destiny.’