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The Blades’ toughest son of a bitch grins, looks at the priest, and announces, “Sorry, Father, I’ll always be the worst kind of sinner.”
Father Christopher clears his throat. “Perhaps we can hold off on the impregnating until after we exchange vows?”
“Mommy! Mommy, Mr. Beaumont has a sword in his pants! I want one that big!”
Sometimes romance isn’t cuddle sessions and lingerie—it’s clinging to the edge of the mattress and praying you don’t topple over when your wife decides to hog the entire bed.
We aren’t married, not anymore. But I won’t forget what you’re doing for me, Holly. I needed this and I needed you. When you need me next, don’t hesitate to ask. We’re family, even if it’s not the way we always envisioned, and I learned a long time ago to never take family for granted. Jackson.
Truth: letting Holly walk away is the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Truth: I may have brought up divorce first but only because Holly had lost her spark, her luster, and I wasn’t enough anymore to rekindle her fire. Lie: I’ve moved on.
Children, behave—before I take my stick and shove it where the sun don’t shine.
“What?” He’s all boyish innocence now. “Big heart, Holls, that’s where I was going. Damn, would you get your mind out of the gutter?”
There, I said it. I miss him, Jackson, my ex-husband.
Look at that massive forehead. Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, Andre—you park cars on that thing???
“Sweetheart, you’ve got to breathe.” I’m trying. Doesn’t he see that I’m trying? “Fuck it.”
“You need to breathe for me, Holls. You’re having one of your panic attacks.”
“There isn’t anything I want to do besides this.” And then Jackson, my ex-husband, crashes his mouth down over mine and steals every last breath from my lungs.
“There was never going to be any fixing when we weren’t willing to compromise. We wouldn’t change—that was our downfall.”
Tonight, though, showed me everything that I need to know: I want my ex-wife with everything that I am.
Holly: You asked me if I ever wonder about us . . . Only every day since we signed the papers. Sometimes I think you’ve ruined me for anyone else.
Me: Tonight, I took my first breath of air in over a year. This thing between us . . . it’s not over, sweetheart. If you think I’ve ruined you for anyone else, just know that for me there’s been no one else. Full stop. Period. I’m ready to breathe again, Holls, and I only do that with you.
Jackson’s kiss is seduction in its purest form.
I’m tryin’ real hard to think of something witty to say back to that, but all I’ve got is . . . how do you feel about pancakes?”
“We were breaking, Holls, and I was spending nights on our damn balcony making futile wishes on shooting stars.”
“Don’t do that.” His thumb brushes over the crest of my cheekbone. “Don’t run from me. Tell me what you need to say—I can take it, I promise.”
“But you can’t make a life out of relying on someone else’s happiness to fuel your own and make you feel complete, even if that happiness is your husband’s.”
“I’m sorry,” I tell her, “I’m so fuckin’ sorry for making you feel like I didn’t care. That I wasn’t proud of you and everything you’ve done. That you felt, even for one damn second, that you were taken for granted . . . and that when you were no longer there in reach every moment of the day, you weren’t worth my time anymore.”
“I was once fucked by a puck.” Pure. Unforgiving. Silence.
I hold up a hand, silencing the rumble of laughter. “No, but, really. Henri, dude, that can’t be—” “To the face!” Bordeaux thrusts a finger at his chin. “A puck to the face, épais. Osti de tabarnak de câlice.”
“You,” she growls, and it’s such a cute attempt at being all aggressive and feisty that I grab her hand in mine and press a kiss to her palm. Then murmur, “On a scale of one to ten, how much do you want to throw me out of the plane right now?”
“You have me on my knees.”
but I missed you every fucking day that you weren’t mine to touch, mine to fuck, mine to love.”
I rip the proverbial bandage off with six little words: “I found out about my parents.”
Fun fact, sweetheart, you can’t be careful and love hard all at once.”
“I’m not goin’ anywhere, Holly. You can love me as hard as you want, and I won’t budge. I’m a safe bet.”
“Always you, sweetheart. Always you.”
“I’m sorry,” he rasps between kisses, his hands clutching my hips and keeping me close. “I’m so sorry for letting us fall apart. This year . . . these last three years.”
“You walked into my life fourteen years ago, Holls, and you turned the whole damn thing upside down. And when things came tumbling, I had no idea how to stop it from shattering altogether. I let you down, sweetheart, and for that, I’ll never forgive myself.”
But I realized today . . . I can’t do this without you by my side. I need your strength when I’ve got none left.
“You have something to tell me, Holls.” “Yes, I’ll marry you again.”
“Always you, Holls. Always you.”
As the crowd freaks the hell out, I don’t know whether to kiss or spank my wife.
“You’re a goddess.”
