I had written the passage about her father’s funeral straight after it happened and had promptly forgotten it. I remembered it then because she had called for help at the airport and was doing so again now. At the time I had taken it literally, she wanted help carrying John, but when I reread the passage it was impossible not to think of something else, something greater, a cry from her inner being, to me, I had to go to her rescue. I had to put everything aside, she was in distress, I had to help. I hadn’t done that, I had lost my temper and was embarrassed. When she screamed in the night I
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