It was only much later that I had the audacious idea that with my departure for my mother’s house for the second six months before I left home, and then for college far away, he had felt abandoned, and even betrayed. It wasn’t fair, but may have been true nonetheless: he had been negligent about spending time with me and caring for me, but now that it was time for me to go, he was angry at my departure. At the time, I would have told you that he hated me and that he must have hardly noticed my presence, that it could not possibly be missing me that had stirred him to such a fury. I was not
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