My Thoughts Exactly

by Allen Lily

We all live with shadows. Mine have been magnified somewhat because I’m in the public eye, but I don’t claim them to be darker than anyone else’s – it’s just that I can only talk about my own, and at times they’ve felt pitch-black. Sometimes, I made them darker than they needed to be, but it can be hard to let the light in when you’re troubled. I’ve been troubled.

You become a people-pleaser because you’re always guarding against further rejection.

That’s why the only important thing is to know what you want as a woman and a human and a sexual person. You may not get it, and you may be overridden, but knowing what you want and making sure you try and assert that, means that at least you start from a place of power and strength.