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by
Kapil Gupta
Read between
May 16 - May 21, 2019
Q: Who am I? A: That which remains when you remove all the things that you are not. Q: What things am I not? A: All that you believe yourself to be.
I am saying that advice has no effect upon human beings.
Q: That I am that which remains after I have removed all the things I believe myself to be. A: Yes.
If you examine it sincerely, it will take you somewhere. If you use it as a crutch or a prescription, it will take you nowhere.
WHY DO I GET ANGRY WHEN I AM INSULTED?
.h1
Q: Why do I get angry when I am insulted? A: Because you entertain the verity of the insult.
A: Yet when you are called stupid, it makes you angry. Because something within you entertains the possibility that you might, in fact, be. Then something else within you grows irritated by the idea that you might be. This internal conflict manifests itself as anger.
HOW DO I DEAL WITH A DIFFICULT PERSON?
.h1
A: Your troubles arise because of your insistence that they not be difficult.
A: Wrong does not exist. Hope leads only to disappointment.
Q: So, what you are saying is to accept them for who they are?
A: The discomfort that arises from being in the presence of a difficult person arises from your insistence that they not be difficult.
Q: So, I need only to understand that the discomfort arises from my insistence that they not be difficult. Is this correct? A: Yes. Q: Without trying to accept them as who they are? A: This is correct.
IS THERE A GOD?
.h1
A: When one wish is granted, you will beg for another. When it is not, you will either wait in hope, or curse out of spite. Dependency will rob you of your freedom.
WHAT IS THE MEANING OF LIFE?
.h1
A: I am saying that life has no meaning.
A: Do you believe that it flows in order to reach the ocean? Q: I don’t understand. A: Do you believe that the reason that it flows is because it wishes to reach the ocean? Do you believe that the entire reason for its flowing is to make it a point to reach the ocean? Q: No. A: Then why do you believe that life has a meaning or a point?
Q: Why might someone choose to become a success? A: Because he enjoys it. Because he is skillful at it. Because he feels alive in pursuing his craft at the highest level.
A: If a human life is devoted to something, one tends to lose oneself in it. As one loses oneself in it, the more blissful one becomes.
A: Anything that has a guaranteed shelf life has no meaning.
WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO RAISE A CHILD?
.h1
Q: What is the best way to raise a child? A: To become firmly established in the knowledge that he does not belong to you.
Q: Do I not care for the child? A: Care for the child in every way. But if you believe that he belongs to you, you will interfere. And this interference will cost you in ways that you cannot imagine.
Q: What is the truth as to why I have had such a tumultuous ride as a parent? A: Because you are attached to your children.
The Truth is that attachment is the greatest bondage in the life of man. The problem that you are experiencing is not that you do not know how to be unattached. The problem is that you do not realize the consequences of attachment.
Attachment gives birth to hope and need. If you are attached to them, you will need them to do certain things, achieve certain things, be a certain way, and behave toward you in a certain way. When they do not, it will cause you pain. When you experience pain, you will behave toward them in a way that pain compels you to behave. And they will behave toward you in a way that their need for freedom compels them to behave. And this will continue for the rest of your lives.
Do I let them behave however they want?
Behavior is the leaf of a tree. Understanding is its root. I will not tell you how to arrange your leaves. I will only tell you to proceed by way of understanding. Understand the consequences of your motivations. If the consequences are acceptable to you, you may choose to proceed. If they are not, you may choose to examine your motivations.
A: No human being knows love. He knows only attachment in the name of love. Q: If I were to raise my children without attachment, what would this do for them? A: They would have freedom. Q: Is it my responsibility to give them freedom? A: It isn’t a question of responsibility. It is a question of living in accordance with nature. Q: Yet you do not believe in responsibilities? A: No. Q: Why, if I may ask? A: Responsibility is a societal creation. No one is truly responsible for another. You do not owe your children anything. They do not owe you anything.
If you wish to do, then do. If they wish to do, they may also do. That which comes from the heart is natural and satisfying.
That which comes from the idea of responsibility is forced, artificial, and often produces resentment and the...
This highlight has been truncated due to consecutive passage length restrictions.
HOW DO I DEAL WITH ANGER?
.h1
Q: Do you not think anger is wrong? A: I don’t view things in terms of right and wrong. Q: Why not? A: Because right and wrong are societo-religious creations. They have no basis in reality.
A: It is not that you do not like getting angry. The Truth is that you do not like having been angry.
A: Because you will not cure something that you do not have a problem with.
Q: Why do I get angry in the first place? A: Because you wish to.
A: A part of you relishes getting angry. For when you do, you are able to exercise your right to become angry. You enjoy this right. For you feel that you have been wronged, and thus your anger is justified. You do not wish to pass up on exercising this right. But another part of you feels remorse for having been angry. And this remorse is to some degree, disingenuous. The remorse makes you feel better and morally correct. For if you had felt good about getting angry, you would have a difficult time accepting yourself.
Q: And if I truly did wish to never become angry, what would I need to understand? A: That anger is not as reactionary as you think it to be. It is a weapon that you enjoy using in order to protect your ego and to bolster it.
WHAT IS THE SECRET TO GETTING PEOPLE TO LISTEN TO YOU?
.h1
A: The need to be listened to will sabotage your efforts.
A: You may say them sparingly. And evaluate the responses as you say them. Refine your approach in accordance with the responses that you quietly observe.
A: I try to find the rock bottom Truth in the situation. And devote myself to extracting all need.
A: That it is likely you who steered him toward the disaster that you are now attempting to save him from.
A: Understand that you are the architect of this relationship. And, in many ways, the architect of your son’s fate. Become the person he would seek to embrace. Provide a place of peace that he is looking for in the wrong places. As he recognizes that you have transformed from a place of need, into a source of quiet comfort, he will come. And he will listen.
FROM WHERE DOES ADDICTION ARISE?
.h1
All humans are pleasure addicts. Alcohol and drugs are only a detail.
A: All addiction creates bondage.
From morning until night, a human seeks nothing other than pleasure. In the smallest thing. And the largest thing. All addictions stem from this one characteristic of mind.
A: It is the search for pleasure that produces pain.
