Happiness: A Guide to Developing Life's Most Important Skill

by Matthieu Ricard

As difficult as it is to separate these various aspects, it is possible to recognize and use the positive facets of a thought generally considered to be negative.

When we fall into the sea, it is the water itself that buoys us and allows us to swim to shore. But we still need to know how to swim—that is, to have enough skill to exploit the emotions to good effect without drowning in their negative aspects.

These techniques are simply different ways of tackling the same problem and achieving the same result: not to fall victim to the afflictive emotions and the suffering they lead to. In the same vein, it is easy to imagine several ways to avoid being poisoned by a toxic plant. We can use antidotes developed to neutralize the effects of specific poisons. We can also identify the source of our vulnerability to such poisons, our immune system, and then, in a single operation, strengthen that system with a universal resistance to all of them. We can, finally, analyze the poisons, isolate their component elements, and discover that some, applied in appropriate dosage, have medicinal qualities.

Each of these techniques is like a key; it makes little difference whether it be made of iron, silver, or gold, so long as it opens the door to freedom.

“Positive anger,” or rather indignation, can disrupt the status quo of an unacceptable situation or make someone understand that she is acting hurtfully, but such anger, inspired solely by selflessness, is rare. More often than not, our anger will have hurt someone while leaving us in a state of deep dissatisfaction. We should never underestimate the power of the mind to create and crystallize worlds of hatred, greed, jealousy, euphoria, or despair.

With the help of experience, we can deal with negative emotions before they surface. We can “see them coming” and learn to distinguish those that bring suffering from those that contribute to happiness. The techniques we have described can help us to better manage our emotions, which will gradually stop overwhelming us. In order to prevent forest fires in times of drought, the forester cuts firebreaks, lays up stores of water, and remains alert. He knows very well that it’s easier to extinguish a spark than an inferno. At a later stage, growing knowledge and mastery of the mind will allow us to deal with our emotions at the very moment they appear, as they express themselves. That, as we’ve seen, is how the emotions that assail us are “liberated” as they form. They become incapable of sowing confusion in the mind and of being converted into words and acts that generate suffering. This method calls for perseverance, because we are not accustomed to dealing with thoughts in this manner.

Contrary to what one might imagine, inner freedom with respect to the emotions leads to neither apathy nor indifference. Life does not lose its color. It is simply that instead of being the plaything of our afflictive thoughts, moods, and disposition, we become their master. Not like a tyrant who exerts relentless and obsessive control over his subjects, but like a free human being who is master of his own fate. At this point conflictive mental states give way to a rich palette of wholesome emotions that interact with other people ...