coloring your perception from then on of everyone you meet and everything that happens, especially if you are traumatized more than once. After a while, you have less and less choice in the matter; the protective stance hardens into a way of seeing and experiencing the world. It feels like the way you are: I’m just distant. I’m just unemotional. I’m just suspicious. I’m just small and unthreatening. I’m just mean and aggressive. You have blinders on about what is possible for yourself and for human interactions, and you don’t
