My mother had always had a remarkable ability to bend reality to her will.
This is a little amusing to me because this is also a great way to describe something about my mom. In her case, it seemed to usually come from a place of love, which does not feel the same way the author thinks of her mother’s behavior. But, I remember my mom telling people about things that absolutely did not happen, because she wanted to ease their hurt or give them comfort in some way. It was kindness, but it was definitely a revision of the truth!
There were also some times when she attributed motives to someone else’s behavior that led to hurt feelings. Like, in one long-term friendship, where another couple didn’t seem to extend the same hospitality to her that she had extended to them, she saw them as greedy or “using her,” where it was likely more accurate that they just thought she liked hosting, or perhaps they didn’t feel like their cooking was as good, or their home was as well-set-up for visitors. My mom’s story about what had happened became the Truth, though, as far as she was concerned.
In retrospect, I wonder how many things in my life story were adjusted so the facts as I knew them were the way she wanted me to think about them. I would say I wish I could ask her, but because she was so sure of her views, I doubt she would have even been able to identify when that may have happened. It was just how she was.
