A well-known and respected author on infertility insists that the “white lie” is a kindly, humane act. He wrote, “It is a violation like burning fallen leaves in the street so they will not scatter over the neighbor’s lawn. It is the type of offense to which the good accomplished, completely neutralizes the infraction of a law.
I can see where covering up someone’s origins being from a donor might have been seen that way, as a positive thing - similar to not telling people they were adopted.
But in so many situations, if anyone else knows, eventually something will come out, even before the DNA services. It is so harmful to a person’s sense of identity to have something like that be a surprise.
