The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

by Stephen R. Covey

“Pygmalion effect,”

Did you ever consider how ridiculous it would be to try to cram on a farm—to forget to plant in the spring, play all summer and then cram in the fall to bring in the harvest? The farm is a natural system. The price must be paid and the process followed. You always reap what you sow; there is no shortcut.

Personality Ethic

No step can be skipped.

“Using intimidation builds weakness because it reinforces dependence on external factors to get things done. When fear replaces cooperation, both people involved become more illogical and defensive.”

Personality Ethic.

It says if you want to have a happy marriage, be the kind of person who generates positive energy and sidesteps negative energy rather than empowering it.

If you want to be trusted, be trustworthy.

others. It says it is futile to put personality ahead of character, to try to improve relationships with others before improving ourselves.

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.

“Lift off” takes a tremendous effort, but once we break out of the gravity pull, our freedom takes on a whole new dimension.

self-mastery.

But as the story shows, true effectiveness is a function of two things: what is produced (the golden eggs) and the producing asset or capacity to produce (the goose).

Basically, there are three kinds of assets: physical, financial, and human.

Keeping P and PC in balance makes a tremendous difference in the effective use of physical assets.

To maintain the P/PC Balance, the balance between the golden egg (production) and the health and welfare of the goose (production capability) is often a difficult judgment call.

“THAT WHICH WE OBTAN TOO EASILY, WE ESTEEM TOO LIGHTLY. IT IS DEARNESS ONLY WHICH GIVES EVERYTHING ITS VALUE. HEAVEN KNOWS HOW TO PUT A PROPER PRICE ON ITS GOODS.”

We are not our feelings.

Between stimulus and response, man has the freedom to choose.

the freedom to choose.

Reactive people build their emotional lives around the behavior of others, empowering the weaknesses of other people to control them.

“I am what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday,”

It’s not what happens to us, but our response to what happens to us that hurts us.

Worth remembering

Proactive people make love a verb. Love is something you do: the sacrifices you make, the giving of self, like a mother bringing a newborn into the world.

“Circle of Concern.”

Create a circle of concern and then divide it into what you can control / influence and what you can’t. Those things you can influence do something about it. Make a plan.

Proactive people focus their efforts in the Circle of Influence. They work on the things they can do something about. The nature of their energy is positive, by determining which of these two circles is the focus of most of our time and energy, we can discover much about the degree of our proactivity.

The proactive approach is to change from the inside-out: to be different, and by being different, to effect positive change in what’s out there—I can be more resourceful, I can be more diligent, I can be more creative, I can be more cooperative.

The commitments we make to ourselves and to others, and our integrity to those commitments, is the essence and clearest manifestation of our proactivity.

And what are my commitments ?

By making and keeping promises to ourselves and others, little by little, our honor becomes greater than our moods.

Knowledge, skill, and desire are all within our control.

“Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right things.”

direction, purpose, and family feeling.

Circle of Influence,

It is, rather, the ongoing process of keeping your vision and values before you and aligning your life to be congruent with those most important things.

This is a great peace of advice.

The core of any family is what is changeless, what is always going to be there—shared vision and values. By writing a family mission statement, you give expression to its true foundation.

One of the fundamental problems in organizations, including families, is that people are not committed to the determinations of other people for their lives. They simply don’t buy into them.

Organize and execute around priorities.

Circle of Influence.

But your accounts with the people you interact with on a regular basis require more constant investment.

Just listen and seek to understand.

Their security is based on the opinions of other people, and they worry about what others might think.

We have such a tendency to rush in, to fix things up with good advice. But we often fail to take the time to diagnose, to really, deeply understand the problem first.

How can I improve my responses.

Seek first to understand, then to be understood.

Ethos is your personal credibility, the faith people have in your integrity and competency.

endurance, flexibility, and strength.

“The greatest battles of life are fought out daily in the silent chambers of the soul.”

Character cannot be made except by a steady, long continued process.

Where does intrinsic security come from?