The Defining Decade: Why Your Twenties Matter—And How to Make the Most of Them Now

by Meg Jay

PREFACE: WHAT IS THE DEFINING DECADE? • Research suggests that 80 percent of our most defining moments take place by age thirty-five. What are some defining moments you hope will happen for yourself by that age? • Some readers who are twenty-nine or thirty-two worry that The Defining Decade does not apply to them. Is it ever too late to be intentional, or is “It’s too late for me” an excuse not to take charge of one’s life? INTRODUCTION: REAL TIME • On average, young adults “settle down” later than they used to. What are some benefits and risks of this cultural shift? How might you use this shift—and this time—to better your life to come? And what are some pitfalls that you, personally, would like to avoid? • Consider how the messages in popular culture about one’s twenties intersect with the culture(s) in which you were raised. What do you think your parents and/or those around you expect from you in your twenties? Is this in line, or at odds, with what you want for yourself? WORK: IDENTITY CAPITAL • What are ten pieces of identity capital you have right now? Think about what you have going for yourself or ask a friend to answer this question for you. (Remember that not all identity capital goes on a résumé. Assets or qualities or hobbies or details that stand out about you or make you interesting count too.) What are three pieces of identity capital you would like to earn next? • When you are in your twenties, must every job add to your identity capital? When is it all r...