Jonny Appleseed

by Joshua Whitehead

I always liked to let them think they were the ones in control. I’m a sadist like that, I guess. I may be the sexual fantasy but I’m also the one in the driver’s seat.

I wish he knew that when an NDN laughs, it’s because they’re applying a fresh layer of medicine on an open wound.

There are times when you have to scare yourself to find yourself.

nowadays I think that they’re drunk because they’re feeling all kinds of pain.

My kokum had always told me that sleep was not a waste of time, that it was a time for healing, so I slept long and hard, waiting for my blood to leech out its memories and for my body to rejuvenate.

if I want to survive, I’d have to leave. But it’s hard, you know? Each second I’m away from home is time that’s gone forever, driving us that much closer to the end. How much more time do we really have? And by whose measure? Like she said, maybe there aren’t that many more moments to come. But at least there was this one.

It was then I decided that love sounded more like a full stop than a semi-colon, and I moved too much like water.

It’s overwhelming to think about all the stories that we’ve made, helped to tell, helped to create—our bodies are a library, and our stories are written like braille on the skin.