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As important as it is to make these incidents visible by reporting them, sensationalizing and digesting these stories is also a form of social control, a reminder that I need to be afraid and to try to be as invisible as possible.
Why is my humanity only seen or cared about when I share the ways in which I have been victimized and violated?
This praise highlights another problem with the idea of the “good man”—the bar is ultimately a low one, and men are heralded every day for engaging in basic acts of domestic labour like washing dishes.
“typical” is dangerously interchangeable with “acceptable.”
If we want masculinity to be different, we must confront and tackle the baseline instead of longing for exceptions.
