An Anonymous Girl

by Greer Hendricks

We all have reasons for our actions. Even if we hide the reason from those who think they know us best. Even if the reasons are so deeply buried we can’t recognize them ourselves.

Greer & Sarah:We write every line of our novels together in real time, using Google Docs and Hangouts, and we both vividly recall crafting these words. In fact, this passage from the prologue is one of the first sections we worked on. We knew it would set the tone for our entire book, so it was vital we got it right. Although we typically shuffle lines, substitute words, and flip around scenes during the revision process, this one remained largely intact from that first draft.

I don’t fear strangers, though. I’ve learned more harm can come from familiar faces.

These thoughts belong to our main character Jessica Farris, who works as a freelance makeup artist and therefore enters strangers’ apartments every day. We wanted to explore the idea that although we’re told from the time we’re children to be wary of strangers, often it’s the people closest to us that cause the most harm: Family members, friends, or work colleagues. Unfortunately, Jessica knows this all too well. This passage hints at the dark secrets Jessica carries. Because she feels she can’t unburden herself to anyone, she’s a particularly vulnerable subject for the mysterious Dr. Shields.

Money is vitally important to you. It appears to be an underpinning of your ethical code. When money and morality intersect, the results can illuminate intriguing truths about human character. People are motivated to break their moral compasses for a variety of primal reasons: survival, hate, love, envy, passion. And money. More observations: You put your

One of our goals forAn Anonymous Girlwas to give readers a sense of immediacy. So, as Jessica considered how she’d respond to different ethical dilemmas posed by Dr. Shields, we provided space for our readers to do the same. In this passage, Dr. Shields is scrutinizing Jessica, trying to pinpoint Jessica’s strengths and weaknesses.

And sometimes the people who seem the most accomplished and together are the ones who can hurt you the deepest.

The origin story behind this line began many months before we actually started to write, when we were still in the research and plotting phase of the book. We are constantly texting and emailing ideas to each other - links to articles, for example, or photographs to inspire our characters’ appearances. In this particular instance, we both read a small, but chilling, article inThe New York Times. It involved a young female employee who was called into her male boss’s office. Her boss accused her of theft, and said she would have to remove her top to prove she wasn’t hiding the missing item…the events that followed grew even more disturbing and twisted. Although our book did not explore this topic in detail, it certainly informed the backstory of our character Jessica.

That is the age when everything changed for you. Every lifetime contains pivot points—sometimes flukes of destiny, sometimes seemingly preordained—that shape and eventually cement one’s path. These moments, as unique to each individual as strands of DNA, can at their best cause the sensation of a catapult into the shimmer of stars. At the opposite extreme, they can feel like a descent into quicksand.

Oh, we worked really hard on this passage. We venture that most people can name a “pivot point” in their life - a moment that changed its course forever. For some, it might be a wonderful event, such as falling in love, which we equate with “catapulting into the shimmer of stars.” Or it might be something negative- “a descent into quicksand.” When we worked on this section, it made us to think about the pivot points in our own lives. One of our most positive ones was certainly when we decided to collaborate together as a writing team!

Uncertainty is an excruciating state in which to exist. A moral question that never appeared in my study continues to claim prominence in my mind: Is it possible to look someone you love in the eye and tell a lie without experiencing remorse?

Dr. Shields sees the world in black and white. It’s difficult for Dr. Shields to understand shades of gray - the compromises, white lies, or character failings - that nearly every relationship contains to one degree or another. This question is pivotal, because, had Dr. Shields not needed to pose it and prove its answer one way or another, beyond a doubt, Jessica would never have become ensnared in such a dangerous web of deceit and betrayal.

We all have reasons for our judgments, even if those reasons are so deeply buried we don’t recognize them ourselves.

This is an echo of our prologue; so much of our novel centers around the way we view and judge situations - sometimes with very little conscious thought. One idea we explore is that our perception of a situation can change based on the type of day we are having. For example, if we are tired and stressed, we may be a lot more judgemental about the motives of a man who roars by in violation of the speed limit, or a woman talking on her cell phone in a quiet coffee shop. Our own ethical judgements can be quite elastic.

EVERY FAMILY GENERATES its own particular dysfunction. Many people believe that once they cross the threshold into adulthood, this legacy can be shed. But the maladjusted dynamics that have been imprinted upon us, often since childhood, are tenacious.

Families are certainly complicated. We are shaped by so many things beyond our control - from birth order to a parent’s style of discipline - and although many people believe they can outgrow, outrun, or outthink the way these deeply ingrained experiences have affected them, doing so can prove difficult. As a psychiatrist, Dr. Shields sees clients every day that carry invisible legacies created by their families. And Dr. Shields also carries some complicated emotional inheritances.

“You would know,” she responds. “The joy—the sense of completeness it can offer a person—is directly proportional to the amount of anguish one experiences when that love is withdrawn.”

Again, this is from Dr. Shields’ perspective. We fully agree that the more you love someone, the worse you will feel if that love, for whatever reason, vanishes. The question that remains is one we as authors can’t answer. It’s something everyone has to decide for him or herself: Whether the love was worth the pain it cost when it disappeared.

And last but never least, to our readers: We love connecting with you, so please find us on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. And to sign up for our very occasional newsletters, please visit our websites: www.greerhendricks.com and www.sarahpekkanen.com We’d love to stay in touch with you.

We are excited to share that our book has been optioned for a television series! So, hopefully you will soon see Jessica and Dr. Shields from the comfort of your living rooms. We’re currently hard at work on our next novel. Like our debut,The Wife Between Us, andAn Anonymous Girl, it’s another psychological thriller featuring strong female characters. We are extremely grateful for our readers, and we hope you find our stories entertaining and thought-provoking. Thank you for taking the time to read our work.