This feeling is common. To me, it suggests that Hochschild’s observation—that power struggles over who does what in a relationship aren’t just about fairness but about the “giving and receiving of gratitude”—has an added layer today: guilt. Like many women, Angie feels resentment because her husband is not doing enough. But she also believes that she is not doing enough, and can never do enough, and that she should be doing everything all the time. “If I were to say, ‘Okay, I’ll give you a break and take care of the kids 100 percent, but it’s going to be my way,’ ” Clint confesses to her at
...more
