And if insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different result, then I guess you could say I went insane, but I did not feel insane at all in those days, though I did sometimes feel a gnawing pain in my stomach, not like I wanted to vomit but a bit like I have felt, maybe you have felt, when you rush to catch the train and make it just in time based on the schedule and you stand there at the platform’s edge, leaning over, peering down into the dark and empty tunnel where the train was meant to be, five, now twenty minutes ago, and arrival times have come and keep on going and you
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