Who Am I?: Discovering the Person You Were Created to Be

by Jeff Little

How you act forms your character. Your character frames your future.

We want to be seen, recognized, known, and loved.

Most days we live in the gap—the gap between the ideal way we see ourselves and the way the rest of the world perceives

We love the possibilities this narrative creates for us. And yet when we step back in a moment of quiet reflection, we know it’s not real. It’s a narrative fallacy.

The scariest thing about these radical shifts in identity is the why behind the what. The motivation for their behavior is more significant than the actions themselves. Most drastic course corrections don’t come from people who were unsuccessful in reaching their perception of the best version of themselves; the opposite is true.

Even the most gifted, accomplished, and successful among us are incapable of self-identifying.

We all have blind spots—at least

the fool understands he doesn’t kno...

Wise people want God’s best for you. Evil people bring harm to you. A fool wants something from you. And the uninformed can’t tell the difference between these three.

Wise people want to add value to others everywhere they go.

The Bible is saying you were fashioned, designed, and handcrafted with careful thought and loving intentionality by the Greatest Artist in the history of the universe.

This is exactly what sin does to our identity. It cracks us and distorts our image.

The entire Bible is filled with stories of people arguing with God about why they could or couldn’t do what He was asking because He didn’t understand what kind of a person they really were.

The more disconnected you are from God, the more you struggle with your identity.

Our identity doesn’t pop out of a microwave—it emerges from the slow cooker.

When we resolve that Jesus knows the truest and most genuine version of our identity, He begins to show us why He made us the way He did.

The more we celebrate the goodness of God in our lives, the less power sin has in our lives.

Goals, titles, championships, and experiences can’t define us because they didn’t create us. The more disconnected you are from God, the more you’ll struggle in your identity.

He tells us that in Christ we have nothing to prove and nobody to impress. Insecurity demands we constantly answer the bell and prove how good we are.

The thing you find the most identity in is the place you are the most vulnerable to insecurity.

The only thing in our lives that doesn’t shake is the Word of the Lord.

Like Moses, we are who God says we are—nothing more, nothing less.

Comparison drives pride because it tells you that you’re better than everyone else.

You may not be a church leader, but your identity as a mother or a father, a spouse, an empty-nester, the manager of your department, the boss/owner of the company, a friend, a sibling, or a follower of Christ, comes from the same place—the influence God has given you. I love to compete

God’s love and approval aren’t zero sum; if

Proverbs 14:30 says, “A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones.”8 Comparison is never satisfied. You never have enough. The Bible uses a really strong word picture: “rots the bones.” In our world, the image of rotting bones makes us think of cancer. That’s the level of threat the Bible wants us to associate with envy.

This story in Ruth shouts to us, ”Don’t overlook the value of divine relationships!”

Here’s what I’m saying: God shapes our identity through the relationships He places us in.

Proverbs tells us we sharpen each other. Hebrews tells us not to give up getting together because we motivate, inspire, stir one another up toward love and good deeds.

When you want to give up, God says, “Get connected.” There is no question whether or not storms are headed for your future. The question is, who will be an anchor in your storm?

Get planted in a local church. Don’t just sit on the back row and observe. Jump in. Serve. Be a blessing to someone else. It will stretch you. It will challenge your selfishness. It will require you to forgive. But what it won’t do is leave you alone. Divine relationships shape your identity and take you where God wants you to go.

There’s no way to improve skills, develop your gifts, or function as a human being without some failure.

He wanted to be close enough to God to hear His voice above all the other opinions in His life.

Remember what Jesus told Peter:After you’ve been tested, strengthen your brothers.

Happiness is elusive and fleeting—as soon as you get some, it vanishes again. It’s hard to be happy when you feel unfulfilled.

Thankfully, this truth is being restored and is becoming more common.5 And the good news is, not only does God want us to be happy, but He tells us how to do it—not a flippant, circumstantial happiness, but a happiness secure enough to hold on to and strong enough to overcome the deepest pain we face. _____

This is essentially the tone of the rest of the book—bouncing back and forth between the frustrating futility of life while also appealing to and encouraging the reader to pursue happiness in the little things because they are a gift from God.

Unhappiness is a state of mind that must be confronted if you want to get rid of it.

Jesus knew what it meant to feel the deepest depths of emotional, spiritual, and physical pain.

When we fixate on why it happened, or imagine what we (or others) could have done differently to prevent what took place, we prolong our healing. It’s an endless cycle filled with regret and remorse. It doesn’t move us forward.

There’s only One who can satisfy the deepest longings of our soul. And it’s not our soul mate,

It’s the One who created us.

He asks if they’ve forgotten what was written in the beginning…God’s plan for a man and woman to become one.

Then He takes His endorsement of marriage to the next level: “Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

“The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the Lord.”

That kind of marriage can withstand and grow through all kinds of character flaws, weird idiosyncrasies, and circumstantial challenges. It’s a thing of beauty built on the willingness to forgive one another because Jesus has forgiven us.

If you’ve found the treasure Proverbs describes—a loving, healthy, growing marriage founded on God’s Word—this immediately makes sense to you.

find encouragement and strength knowing God wants a healthy marriage for my daughters more than I do.

God wants to speak to your spouse through you, and the results end up blessing both of you. Your spouse is reminded of who they are in Christ, they find strength and joy, and they end up loving you more.

In the early stages of life, when the identity of a child is being formed, no single factor is as influential as Mom and Dad.