Al Bernstein, a clinical psychologist, agrees. He calls it the “Godzilla vs. Rodan” effect. When the other person starts yelling and you start yelling and you both follow the war metaphor, buildings gets knocked down, Tokyo gets leveled, but very little gets accomplished. You might think, “I’m just trying to explain . . .” But Bernstein says this is a trap. Explaining is almost always veiled dominance. You’re not trying to educate; you’re still trying to win. The subtext is, “Here’s why I am right and you are wrong.” And that is exactly what the other side will hear no matter what you say.
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