A Ladder to the Sky
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Read between February 9 - February 12, 2019
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‘You want to be what?’ ‘I want to be a success,’ he replied, and perhaps I should have heard the deep intent in his tone and been frightened by it.
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‘I do not believe that Erich Ackermann was an evil man,’ he remarked at one point with a shrug. ‘Just a misguided one. What you might call a fool in love. But a fool in love at a very dangerous time.’
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‘Although I must admit there are times when I think that I should only read the work of dead writers. I’m not sure that the living have very much to say any more.’
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There were hundreds of reasons for spending the autumn of one’s life on the Amalfi Coast
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‘That loyalty means nothing unless it has at its heart the absolute principle of self-sacrifice?
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‘Sic transit gloria mundi,’ said Gore. ‘All glory is fleeting. Erich used the same line with me once. When we were in Rome.’
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‘When a thing has been said and said well, have no scruple. Take it and copy it.’
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‘People seem to think that a life is worthless unless it’s shared with someone,’ said Maurice with a sigh. ‘But why must that be the case? I’ve been married, I know what the experience is like, and while there were certainly times when it was pleasurable there were just as many times when I wished that I was alone, not answerable to anyone, not needing to account for my every movement throughout the day.
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You must remember, this is what a writer does. Uses his or her imagination. Tries to understand how it feels to be alive in a moment that never existed with a person who never lived, saying words that were never spoken aloud.’
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‘Whenever a friend succeeds,’ said Theo, ‘a little something in me dies. That was Truman Capote, wasn’t it?’ ‘No, that was Gore,’ I said,
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No one said anything for a few moments. I’d only been at their table a few minutes but had already managed to insult them both and make them each feel like shit, so I was beginning to feel that my work there was done. Suddenly I longed for the days before I’d met Theo, when I was just a solo drinker and rarely spoke to anyone. Life was simpler then.