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How can a man as old and washed-up as me possibly find a reason to live?
His favorite one-hundred-year-old has found a reason to live.
It’s not the least bit funny, but I can’t help but chuckle at the thought that my Little Brother and I might not have a year of life-expectancy between the two of us.
But here’s the thing about loving someone—it makes you forget what “impossible” means.
Maybe the wishes are like his pill, and when the time comes that the wishes are gone, there’ll be nothing left to sustain him.
“S, B, K,” Tiegan says. “Strong, brave, and kind.
“SBK is a constant reminder, every time we greet each other, every time we say goodbye, it’s a reminder of how to live. It’s so much more than a greeting.”
Funny thing is, the closer I get to my own house, the farther I feel from home.
And that’s the thing about loving someone: somehow or another, it always ends bad.
You’ll have plenty of time to be dead, Murray. But this is the only time you have to live. Don’t throw that gift away.”
“We’re never as lost as it seems, Murray,” Father says. “There’s always a path to take. But we have to want to take it.”
The kid’s become my navigational beacon. My compass. And I like to think maybe I’ve become his.
I have to find myself, to figure out who I am and who I want to be.
And as I lecture him on what he’s missing out on, I’m talking to my thirty-year-old self every bit as much as him.
But now I see it. It’s because there are two hearts in each of us. The one that shows what we’re made of. How much we love and how well we live. Jason’s got more of that heart than anyone I’ve ever met, along with maybe Tiegan. But there’s also the physical heart. The one that only has one job—to push blood through our bodies and keep us alive.
“I guess he gives people free will,” I say. “And that has consequences.”
Father James says suicide is a sin. But this isn’t suicide. Not in my book. In my book it’s a sacrifice.
“Everyone deserves a list, way I see it. Everyone has one. Sometimes they’re just too blind to see it.”
My father. Here. Supporting me. As he always has, I suppose. In his own way.
