Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love

by John M. Gottman

It’s where we listen to understand, without judgment or defensiveness, or the desire to rebut. It is an accepting form of listening. Listening is an action; you have to commit to it. And you can’t do that if you don’t get out of your own head. If you stay inside yourself, the voice you hear will be your own, and not your loved one’s.

Make sure to review this section prior to each of the 8 dates with Megan.

action word—both a verb and a noun. Trust happens in the little moments when we show our partner we are there for them and they do the same for us. Trust is built in small moments of attuning to our partner, and listening like a friend and ally when our partner is experiencing a negative emotion—sadness,