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“Even when you think you’re defeated, dig deeper. Go harder. Press, because there is something worth it on the other side.”
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“But the girl I met in that bar didn’t want to be taken care of. I’d do everything in my power to help you follow your dreams so you could take care of yourself. And then we’d both know you were with me because you wanted to be, not because you had no other choice.”
When I allow myself to look at Iris again, the shadow is gone. Humor and affection light her eyes, for her daughter, maybe for me. If anything, she’s more beautiful than the girl I met in the bar that night. There’s a strength, a maturity, a resolve—I don’t know what has added dimension to what she was before, but it stirs a hunger in me. Not just to taste her body, but to know her heart. To read her mind and share her thoughts.
“If you were mine, Iris, there would be no doubt what position you’d hold in my life. You’d be center. I’d play you at the five.”
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The closeness never moved. I did. I hid behind my anger and shame, and now it’s all exposed. The light breathes grace on me.
Yours to keep and yours to share.
“Lies don’t give up easily. You’ll have to remind yourself and heal yourself over and over, every time they come.”
“Struggle does not make you weak,” she whispers back. “Struggling against those who hold us is what makes us, over time, stronger than they are. Strong enough to fight back. Strong enough to win.” That night, with the soft sounds
Your soul is yours. Your heart is yours. Your body is yours. Yours to keep and yours to share.
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“Your dreams and ambitions got swallowed up when you had to follow Caleb,” I say, holding her eyes with mine. “I want you to know there’s someone who will follow you.”
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Every day that we’re living, breathing, and in good health is a blessing, not promised. Understanding that, seeing him get hurt, makes me realize that I don’t want to go slow after all. Not anymore.