Vulnerability. Shame infiltrates us in an instant, bringing our defenses down. We’re then like a snail stripped of its shell—naked, soft, and suddenly so, so vulnerable. Our common reaction to this vulnerability is to quickly reassemble and refortify ourselves, to retreat into something harder, darker—not only to armor ourselves but also to have a place to hide our vulnerability and any other sign of apparent weakness. Once we become aggressive or emotionally withdrawn, we’re far from vulnerability and the transparency and heart that are central to it. Essential to working skillfully with
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