“But noooooooooo! I have to drive one thooooooousand miles, have my ride stolen, have a stripper kidnap me, lose my homework, and now I’m in the middle of a fuuuuucking field, and the fuuuucking train won’t fuuuuucking slow down . . . so FUUUUUUUUCK YOUUUU, MISSOURI STATE LEGISLATURE!!!”
