Been Here All Along

by Sandy Hall

Because I like him for all those reasons you’re supposed to like people. He’s kind and warm and looks at me like I’m the coolest bitch on earth.

“So I’m bi,” he says. “Huh?” “Bi.” “Are you telling me to leave?”

Buster smiles like someone just gave him the Nobel Prize for Relationship Doctoring. “I am so valid,” Buster says.

I am the antithesis of Chris Evans.

I have—I hate myself even as I think the word—a crush. I have a crush on my best friend. I have become a teen rom-com cliché. There is no hope for me.

Perhaps if I’ve really ruined my life, I can move into a new career as a psychic. I’m already living a fraudulent existence by not coming out of the closet; I could continue the pattern and take people’s money in exchange for bogus fortunes.

“I saw my whole life flash before my eyes!” she wails. “It was so boring!”