We're All Damaged

by Matthew Norman

“Damn right she is. You fuck a fireman behind your husband’s back, you go to the top of the dead-to-me list. Bolded and underlined.” “Paramedic, actually,” I say, for some dumb reason. “What? Like a . . . a fucking ambulance driver? I thought you said a fireman.” “No. A . . . a fucking ambulance driver.” He’s quiet again. “Well, shit, man. That’s even worse.” Not sure why, but he’s right, it is worse.

This was hilarious. My cousin is a Paramedic and I mess with him all the time about being an ambulance driver, lol.