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April 10, 2021 - April 6, 2022
and the wickedly enchanting Mr. Thomas Cresswell, the young man who’d won my heart as deftly as any cardsharp winning hand after hand at his game of choice.
Named after a character from German folklore, Mephistopheles is a demon in the Devil’s employ,” Captain Norwood said. “Known for stealing the souls of those already corrupt, he’s full of magic and trickery,
“Nervous?” I whispered as the aerial performers gracefully descended, one by one. “Of a performance that boasts of causing arrhythmia, according to this program?” He flicked the black-and-white-striped show bill he held. “Not at all. I cannot wait for my heart to burst. Really livens up an otherwise monotonous Sunday evening, Wadsworth.”
The promise of death was as alluring, if not more so, than the prospect of falling in love. What morbid creatures we were, craving danger and mystery in place of happily-ever-afters.
It reminded me of the painting Thomas made for me the week before: an orchid that held the entire universe within its petals.
Want
“What I mean is, I promise to stand by your side through whatever comes our way. You’ll end up being the hero, no doubt, but I’ll look good beside you. And that’s what truly counts.”
“I’m in favor of hiding in your chamber for the remainder of the week.” A smile twitched across his lips as I raised a brow. “Drinking, kissing, debauching ourselves until we arrive in New York.” He sighed dreamily. “You must admit, we’d be safe from the murderer. Deliriously happy. And both of those options are much better than standing over cadavers.”
A raven—dark as ink—opened its wings against a silver moon. Vines and thorns were intricately woven around the card’s edges in thick black strokes. On both the top and bottom center, a strange double eight lay on its side, overlapping itself.
Wou!d like a deck like this
Her gaze drifted over to the card on my nightstand. “Wealth.” “Pardon?” I asked, wondering if she’d already been sipping her tonic. “My husband used to dabble in cartomancy—reading fortunes in playing cards—in his youth.
I could pretend as if I’d never received it. Do the polite and decent thing expected of me. But that path was so utterly dull.
For the first time I noticed his gloves—each one had a crescent moon stitched onto the back of it with stars across the knuckles. They were exquisite.
Want
“Magic is science. It’s simply a fancier term for showing people the impossible is attainable.”
“I love when you look at me that way.” I searched his eyes. “How?” “Like you might possibly love me in the same extraordinary way that I love you.”
A second assistant rolled a coffin-type contraption onto the stage. Holes were cut out near the top, bottom, and sides of the strange box. Lengths of rope were lassoed about each end and also looped over the shoulders of the female assistants. “Oh, good,” Thomas said blandly, “I was hoping they’d wheel the dead out before dessert. Entrails go better with the main course, don’t you agree, Wadsworth?” He crinkled his nose. “Totally wrong for sweets.”
“Such sharp words,” he said. “Your tongue ought to come with a warning.” “Truth is often compared to a blade,” I said. “I question those who marvel when it pricks.”
We women could be called creatures, if only the men who said such careless words accepted our claws were fearsome things when we decided to scratch.
“You might want to explore other avenues of possibility, since you’re such a gifted student of science. I may only offer a few hours of distraction, but for some that is enough to press on through dark times. Hope is an invisible yet mighty force. Don’t dismiss its power.”
Love was a tricky, complicated thing—so morally gray. Both grand and terrible things were often done in its honor.
“Normal is overrated.” Cassie nudged me toward the bar. “Extraordinary is unforgettable.”
He’s all show. I caution you to remember that. He’s inviting, but in the way the flame on a candle is. It might set ambiance, create a sense of warmth, but if you get too close, it will burn you.”
“Their acts might be a lie or an illusion, but they live honestly. They don’t hide who they are, or pretend to play by society’s rules. Not like the nobility, who smile to your face while sticking a dagger in your back.”
I could see the molten core of her harden into steel. She might have bent a little, but she was too strong to break.
“Anyway, what I mean is every rose can draw blood as much as delight. Yet we do not hesitate to inhale their fragrance, do we? Danger does not detract from appeal; it increases it.”
“Removing intestines before luncheon is all right, but clowns are where your limits end?” he asked. “You never cease to amaze me, Wadsworth.
I leveled a severe look at him, and he held his hands up in mock surrender. “A joke. You know… those things I’m horrid at but am practicing nonetheless?”
“The looking glass is infused with magic from Bavaria,” he said. “It is no ordinary glass—this has the ability to show your future.” He ran his hands down the front of his very nice waistcoat, puffing out his chest a bit. “To my knowledge, it has near one hundred percent accuracy with showing who your husband shall be. Most young women leave here quite satisfied.” How extraordinarily disappointing. “Is that all it does?” I asked. “I thought it showed one’s future. What if there is no marriage in mine? Will it not show my career or any other part of my life, then? There are those who prefer to
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“Be cautious with who you give your heart to. And be even more wary of those who seek to steal it.”
“Sometimes we choose not to see things we know are true, simply because we wish to keep the fantasy of what could have been alive. To see the realness of a thing, well, sometimes that removes hope. An unfortunate side effect. As a scientist you must know that. You cannot always remove a tumor without taking a bit of the surrounding healthy tissues, can you?”
People don’t remember mediocre shows. To truly win the minds and memories of the audience, greatness is needed. That’s what turns stories into legends and builds empires.”
Greatness lies in being driven, in not settling simply because you’ve reached one goal. It’s a state of perpetual climbing and striving to best yourself.
“Contentment is the root of complacency. Your cousin chooses to follow him because he is not content to sit back and be just mediocre. Does ‘the Good Houdini’ or ‘the Adequate Houdini’ have the same ring to it?” He shook his head. “I think not. Just like a good tailcoat is not as eye-catching as a great one.”
“You know magic is simply the union of science and trickery. It’s just dressed-up lies.” “And there ain’t no such thing as ghosts!” Harry called from the stage. “Spiritualism is a hoax.”
“Hope is a strong force,” I agreed. “Indeed. I swear I’d clutch that feeling like a tether, never letting go. Same for every one of these acts. The crowd hopes for the impossible to become possible. It shows them dreams don’t belong only in our heads—with hope those fantasies can become real. Taking hope away is like taking life from someone. We all need to believe we can achieve the impossible.”
“You might yank rainbow-colored unicorns from purple clouds and I’d be distracted by your horrible grammar.” Mephistopheles smiled. “If not for me, do it for the poor unicorns. Magical creatures deserve proper speech.”
Thomas offered me the sort of appraising look that set my blood aflame. There was no greater feeling than being admired for my brain.
“Never, ever, give up yourself for someone else, Audrey Rose. The right person will want you just as you are.
“The greatest trick of all is dreaming without limits.”
“I thought dreams were good things,” I said, thinking to the start of our conversation. “Ah, yes, but you cannot forget nightmares often begin as dreams.”
“Ah. I understand now.” Mephistopheles’s lips twitched. “You’re a lunatic.” “I prefer ‘unpredictable.’ It’s got a nicer ring to it.”
“Truth is a blade. Brutal and ice cold. It cuts. Sometimes when spoken carelessly it even scars.
I was focused on two things: the steady war-drum beat of my heart, and the realization that I’d fight a thousand battles and die a thousand ways before I allowed any harm to befall my love.
There was no world I wanted to live in where Thomas Cresswell wasn’t a part of it. No matter the odds stacked against us, I’d fight for him until I drew in my last, shuddering breath. Even in death I’d never stop coming for those who threatened my family. Because that’s what Thomas had become. He was mine—I’d chosen him just as he’d chosen me, and I’d defend him with everything I had. Our friendship had caught fire and blazed with something powerful and untamed. Something I’d been foolish to ever doubt.
I love you, I thought, rallying against the blackness. More than all the stars in the universe. In this life and ever after. I love you.
