Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

by Christopher Moore

By the way, his name was Joshua. Jesus is the Greek translation of the Hebrew Yeshua, which is Joshua. Christ is not a last name. It’s the Greek for messiah, a Hebrew word meaning anointed. I have no idea what the “H” in Jesus H. Christ stood for. It’s one of the things I should have asked him.

“I was thinking about becoming the village idiot, if my father will allow it.” “He has a God-given talent,” Joshua said. “I’ve been talking to Bartholomew the idiot,” I said. “He’s going to teach me to fling my own dung and run headlong into walls.”

Is temptation itself at fault for man’s woes, or is it simply the lack of judgment in response to temptation? In other words, who is to blame? Mankind, or a bad designer?

If there was anything I learned from John the Baptist, it was that the sooner you confess a mistake, the quicker you can get on to making new and better mistakes.

“Josh,” I said in a harsh whisper, “that kid is as dumb as a stick.” “He’s not dumb, Biff, he just has a talent for belief.”

We will be delivered into the kingdom by forgiveness, not conquest.