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December 24, 2017 - March 2, 2018
embrace it. Perfectionists crave acclaim, and go to great lengths to guarantee they receive it - from others and themselves. Creatives recognize that acclaim is merely one of many possible outcomes. They realize their efforts may also attract disapproval and recrimination. Perfectionists loathe uncertainty while creatives face uncertainty with aplomb. (I’m painting with a broad brush. There are certainly creatives who crumble under criticism.)
This perspective is what prevents the perfectionist from facing problems head-on, brainstorming creative solutions, and deciding between flawed options. It prevents him or her from developing an effective problem-solving framework, and using it to
Perfectionism impairs our ability to adapt to changing circumstances and new situations. It discourages us from taking risks, and thereby hampers our personal growth. It encourages negative self-talk, and fuels self-criticism. It inhibits our ability to make decisions. It obstructs our creativity. And it prevents us from solving unexpected problems. Is it any wonder that a life spent in pursuit of flawlessness inevitably leads to frustration?
perfectionists. The more we put others ahead of ourselves, the more we try to be who they want us to be. This is one of the self-destructive side effects of seeking external validation.
Diehard perfectionists are uncompromising. They measure their worth based on what they failed to do rather than what they succeeded in doing. For this reason, they rarely, if ever, experience the joy and sense of accomplishment that comes from a job well done. This isn’t
It’s another thing entirely to look for mistakes, use them as confirmation of our inadequacies, and reprimand ourselves accordingly.
It was only after I curbed my perfectionistic behavior that I realized asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness. On the contrary, it’s a sign of strength. It shows that you recognize the value of collaboration, a smoother and quicker path toward personal and professional growth. If you’re seldom willing to
I mentioned earlier that I was difficult to be around years ago. My perfectionism prompted disagreeable behavior (that’s a diplomatic way of putting it). While some of this behavior was focused inward, much of it was focused on other people. I couldn’t move past my own mistakes. And I couldn’t move past theirs. If you can relate to this problem, I have good news. Mistakes, yours and others, will seem far less consequential once you learn to silence your inner perfectionist.
“paralysis by analysis”
This attitude makes perfectionists difficult to work with. They’re convinced their way is the best way, and consequently dismiss others’ ideas. In reality, their desire for control springs from their insecurities. They fear showing weaknesses or flaws.
three things. First, decouple your sense of self-worth from others’ approval. Recognize that external validation is unnecessary. Second, acknowledge that there’s seldom a need to be “the best” at anything. In most cases, the pursuit of being the absolute best is predicated on seeking external validation. It’s a fool’s errand. Third, accept that you can excel at anything without being “the best.” In fact, you’re likely to experience more growth and develop multiple areas of expertise when you’re not hyper focused on dominating one single practice. Don’t compete to be the top contender. That’ll
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Recall from earlier the importance of giving yourself permission to make mistakes. Mistakes are learning opportunities that’ll fuel your personal and professional growth. Additionally, the fact is, most people will overlook them or consider them to be of negligible consequence. The perfectionist considers each mistake to be a sign of his or her inadequacy. But that self-defeating perception is seldom shared by others. Most people are just not paying that much attention.
This feedback is invaluable because each of us has personal and professional blind spots, or areas in which we lack awareness. Allowed to persist, these blind spots stunt our development. We need others to assess our performance to help us recognize where and how we need to improve.
be clear, the optimalist is no less interested in success than the perfectionist. The difference is in how he or she defines success. It has nothing to do with flawless execution. Nor is it about effecting perfect results. Rather, the optimalist defines success as achieving the best output possible with the least amount of inputs. In this way, optimalism
imposing a time limit on a task or project, the perfectionist must commit to walking away from it, even if it’s imperfect. The time limit eliminates the option to continue making improvements past the point that such improvements make a meaningful difference.

