How to Be Yourself: Quiet Your Inner Critic and Rise Above Social Anxiety

by Ellen Hendriksen

Let’s take the first one. I hate it when someone is lying in wait for my parking space. I feel pressured, imagining the person is growing impatient with me. I worry they’ll honk in disapproval or give me the finger as they floor it and roar away. So for my own practice, I decided I would simply go at my normal pace the next time someone was waiting for my space. What happened? Nothing. The guy waited. It was such a nonissue I felt like it didn’t count. But it did. That was an easy Moment. A few days later, it happened again. That time, the driver slowly drove away after it became obvious I had a cart full of groceries and two wiggly boys unwilling to get in their booster seats. There were no honks or fingers. He just rolled on to someone who might vacate her space before, say, sundown. But even if he had honked or given me the finger? Remember Replace from chapter 5? How bad would that really be? What are the odds? How would I cope? Being on the receiving end of a honk or finger from a stranger would be a little alarming, but I could handle it. I could text my husband and say: “Can you believe this guy?” I could turn it into a teachable moment for the kids about the importance of being patient. All in all, it would be fine.