The Self-Driven Child: The Science and Sense of Giving Your Kids More Control Over Their Lives

by William Stixrud

Some additional strategies for igniting the saboteur include: Frequent exercise. Even short bursts of exercise can activate the brain enough to get started on something, in part by increasing dopamine in the prefrontal cortex. Physical activity is physically activating. Social support. Finding an older kid to serve as a homework coach, or helping your child join a study group of mildly more academic peers, can help his focus. For adolescents, we’re particularly gung ho about peer-to-peer support, because teens are developmentally wired to be attuned to their cohorts. Research has also shown that kids often learn better from other kids than they do from adults, and that when a homework coach is an older kid, the one being tutored has a dopamine spike.14 Another argument for outsourcing: if you have a tendency to be controlling, or even if you aren’t but your child perceives that you are, his saboteur instincts will kick in. Stimulation. Some saboteurs need music in the background to help them accomplish tasks that they’d otherwise avoid. Music can serve as white noise and block out distraction. It can make a boring activity less so. And it can ease anxiety. For others, quiet is better. Your saboteur may have to experiment a bit to see which suits him. There’s also recent evidence that chewing gum can improve activation, processing speed, and work production.15 A healthy, high-protein diet and enough rest. (You’ve heard this a zillion times so we won’t belabor the point. But...