The Invisible Orientation: An Introduction to Asexuality
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The huge amount of diversity in how adults find success and happiness should be acknowledged, even if some adults don’t seek out certain types of partnerships or certain kinds of intimate experiences.
Sarah⭐ The Ultimate Book Hoarder
EXACTLY. One relationship experience is not universal or applicable to everyone. Why do we have to follow a specific way to have relationships when everyone is different?
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Asexuality is more common than most people believe, and it only stands to reason that some percentage of the millions of asexual people would be, for instance, abuse survivors, mentally ill, normatively unattractive, gender nonconforming, or shy. It’s not realistic to assign these traits the blame for those people’s asexuality and only agree to “grant” belief in their orientation if all other possibilities have been eliminated.
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“For some asexual people, the thought ‘I would like to have sex with that person’ could seem as random and unexpected as ‘I would like to paint that person blue, cover them with twigs, and dance around them in a circle all night.’”
Sarah⭐ The Ultimate Book Hoarder
WHY IS THIS SO ACCURATE
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For the majority of repulsed or reluctant asexual people, it’s only the idea or experience of personally being in a sexual situation that seems unappealing;
Sarah⭐ The Ultimate Book Hoarder
THIS
19%
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Some-times I think I taste it more than others. But I’m not sure I like the taste of it. It’s confusing, and it might be easier if I just had a glass of plain water, but I don’t really have any control over that. But overall, I still feel like what I have is much more like water than soda,
21%
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Asexual people in relationships—especially women—face coercion and are at higher risk for sexual assault,
Sarah⭐ The Ultimate Book Hoarder
It's a sad reality we face, and we're always blamed for it as it is assumed consent is always given automatically in relationships or that we owe it.
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outside observers may believe the aggressor deserves sex or that people who are in relationships are in a constant state of consent and therefore are not capable of sexually assaulting each other. Anyone who has relationships with asexual people should try to be particularly aware of the way societal expectations may translate to internal relationship expectations in ways that can damage and abuse any partner who doesn’t desire sex or isn’t willing to engage in it.
22%
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if an asexual person was having regular sex because they felt they were obligated to and that they had no power to refuse, this relationship was dependent upon exploiting a lopsided power dynamic, and that calls into question whether the consent was valid and whether the relationship was appropriate in the first place.
Sarah⭐ The Ultimate Book Hoarder
BAHAHA the call out