Hummingbird Salamander

by Jeff Vandermeer

“I want to abandon words for action. I want to blow up a dam. I want the world without us in it, but to be invisible eyes and ears and breath gliding over that world. To demolish all of it. But not even that—to be rid of this illusion of consciousness, to be a tree or bush or algae on the surface of a pond. Not even a fish’s quick nip of a water glider. Not even that level of intent, but some other intent altogether. And by the time you read this, I will be, my body will be … in the ground, eaten by beetles, eaten by maggots, distributed in a hundred ways, laid low and made mighty … while you remain behind and have to deal with all of this. I’m sorry for that, but it had to be.” And: “Democracy is not enough because it is never really Democracy. The -ism that will fix this has not been written down because it exists in what remains of the world beyond us and we cannot read that language. So we are left with flawed ways of thinking, mechanical ways, that work against the very organic nature of our brains. We have built so many toxic constructs, we cannot see through the latticework. We have built so many mirrors, there are no windows to shatter. But still we must try.”