The Road Between

by Courtney Peppernell

The road between is the road you take from losing yourself to finding yourself

the cave is a temporary fix So when you are ready, you must come back to the light and love the day as much as you love the night

Even if you cannot see the pain it still exists A tree can be tall with pretty leaves but underneath the soil the roots are dying

It feels like my life is just passing by, gone with the current and the wind

Your heart will still break the same way

looking at all the empty spaces your belongings once filled

I wanted to tell you about all the times I kept my feelings to myself, but it was too late because you looked at me and said, “My heart belongs to someone else.”

I am still looking for the parts of you that don’t exist anymore

you’ve been moving on, like you just don’t care.

It reminds me of when you left.

If I were brave, I would have handed you the love letters I wrote back in June.

If you’re lonely and want someone to think about Think about someone else.

I think about all the parts of me you took away. I think about how easily you walked in and made a mess. I think about how my heart exploded the day you left.

Tell yourself the things you would tell someone you love.

You are not a darkness that no person wants to love. You are the lighthouse on top of the hill, warm and beautiful. A heart, guiding people home.

Ache now, love later.

All these tiny embers, drifting up to the sky, making me believe I will find my way home,

Forward from the cave, there is much healing to be done.

You don’t need to edit the pronouns because you are afraid of what people will think I will stand with you There is importance in your spilled ink

You’re standing in front of a beautiful girl and you know her secret Her heart is not made of snow

I could tell you that strangers kiss and it’s all the same. But if your heart isn’t racing and your words don’t fall over each other when you speak, then she is not the one you should be kissing.

I’m jealous of the sheets that hold you while you sleep

It feels like you are always waiting in darkness that doesn’t seem fair

You told me it would be okay. That we had calls and texts and I love yous. But sometimes the distance is too much. And before you could turn and walk away, I kissed you, hoping it would be enough to make you stay.

She wanted to say something. To tell you about the things inside her heart and her mind. But she kept it all a secret, watched as life went by.

every day you think about the people who don’t understand and the ones who leave

You are a kaleidoscope of colors that deserve more Keep holding on You will survive this war

for every time my heart chose to skip, you were breathing your name into my lips.

she makes writing both simple and complex She makes my heart both race and still She is a hurricane and sunlight through my windowsill

I am sorry that your safe haven tries to ignore who you are and it feels like you are drowning. All the times they tell you it’s a phase and the name-calling sends your mind into a daily haze. I am sorry they are stitched so tightly together they may never be opened.

I can tell you that you are doing just fine because who you are is important and I know you’ll shine

Darling, you were born from a star.

I am learning to press love into my skin instead of opening old wounds

I wanted to know you better, learn to love you in every season. Because all the years I’d been scared about what people may say, you had suddenly become all my reasons.

She is my morning sunrise, sleepy eyes that remind me forever exists and a home is nothing more than a goodnight kiss and an arm around my waist in the middle of the night.

in the night I reach for her she keeps me safe My other half to help carry this weight just a reminder our love should not be a debate

Keep your goals in sight

holding hands and looking at the moon I’d spend the rest of my life falling in love with you

The world has been unkind today she said So I replied Step into my arms And with my chin upon her head I whispered Let me be kind instead

there were days when I did not know who I was without loving you.

The night is dotted with stars and I imagine them as fireflies of hope blanketing the earth

Self-worth is very strange We spend hours convincing others to have it And not enough time convincing ourselves

underneath the moon I stood and watched the ladder reach into the stars. I climbed each rung, my heart in my chest, my dreams floating before me.

Just because you don’t fight fire with fire, doesn’t mean you are weak. Sometimes choosing to be the bigger person takes more courage than giving in to the bitter words we so often speak. There can be power in silence.

Please leave the curtains open she said I need to see the moon

Surviving someone is enough reason to remove them from your life.

Allow people to talk about what is important to them.

You don’t have to be in love to love yourself.

You don’t need to thank someone because you’re hard to love They love you because it’s hard not to

I think you are infinite the way you hold yourself how smart you are all these stories you have each bruise and every scar