It’s a silent scream because when you’re a highly controlled, insanely well-behaved A-type with a too-tight grip on life, it’s beyond you to howl your pain at full throttle. I’m in the worst place I’ve been in my life. I no longer care about my own welfare. And yet I’m worried what the neighbors would think if I howled out loud. And the very fact that I’m micromanaging my own breakdown takes me down even further.
