Slapstick

by Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

The gravity is very light today. I have an erection as a result of that.

“The world is full of people who are very clever at seeming much smarter than they really are,” she said. “They dazzle us with facts and quotations and foreign words and so on, whereas the truth is that they know almost nothing of use in life as it is really lived. My purpose is to detect such people—so that society can be protected from them, and so they can be protected from themselves.

“Fascists are inferior people who believe it when somebody tells them they’re superior,” she said.

“If you think this is bad,” I told him, and I tapped my forehead with my fingertips, “you should see what it looks like in here.”

“History is merely a list of surprises,” I said. “It can only prepare us to be surprised yet again. Please write that down.”