Believe in Me (Strickland Sisters, #2)

by Alexandria House

“So you thought the way to fix that was by pushing me away? Hell, I’m beginning to think that’s all you’re

Pull me in and then push me away. That shit doesn’t feel good, Renee.”

“Maybe we are, but we aren’t kids, Doc. We’re adults who’ve already lived through a lot of shit and have earned the right to live how we want and be with who we want to be with when we want to be with them. We don’t have anyone to answer to, and I don’t see any point in dragging my feet with this thing after all the time it took for us to get here in the first place. Do you?” “No…It’s just—you want me to meet your mother.”

He took the seat I’d offered him and leaned forward. “You’re worried about that? Don’t be. You’ve already met her, the same day you met me. And you impressed the hell out of her. She’s been talking about you nonstop ever since and was excited when I told her we were seeing each other.” I raised my eyebrows. “Really?” “Yeah, so she asked me to plan a dinner for all of us.”

“Give me your address, and I’ll answer that question.” “Am I safe with you? Is anyone looking for you?” I almost dropped my fork. “Doc, I will rip a motherfucker’s beating heart out

their chest if they even look at you the wrong way. And what I don’t finish, Rell will.” “Do you own a gun?” “More than one.” “Will you hurt me?” “What? No! I wouldn’t put my hands on you!” “I mean my heart.” I leaned back in my chair. “You think I’d do what your ugly-ass husband did to you?”

know when I have something good, something worth holding on to. All that shit your ex did? Been there, done that. I’m ready for something real…with you.” She leveled a stare at me, opened her mouth, and said, “My address is 116 Du-Lac Circle, Romey, Tennessee, 37027.”

“Negro, I don’t know why you choking. You know you need to marry this girl. She’s the best woman I’ve ever seen you spend time with. Pretty, professional, and obviously crazy about your big ass.”

“Honey, you might have only been in a relationship with him for a couple of months, but that boy has been in love with you since he laid eyes on you. Couldn’t stop talking about you that

day you came out here and delivered my grandbaby. Kept going on and on about the way you steadied his hand when he was about to cut the cord. Said it was like something went through him when you touched him, and he knew you were the woman for him.”

“Come on Mama what? Did you not tell me all of that, Lorenzo Odell Higgs?” Odell? “Damn—I mean—please stop, Mama,” he pleaded. Mel was giggling so hard she was in tears, while Rell wore an amused expression on his face. “Did you?” He sighed. “Yes, ma’am, I did.” “I know you did.”

She shook her head. “I don’t think my ex-husband ever even got as much as a traffic ticket, but he was a horrible person and he treated me like shit for most of our marriage. You? Your

“Zo, did you do something to my ex-husband?”

know you’re not sleep.” Shit. “What, baby?” “You heard me.”

“Yeah, but what do you mean? Why you think I did something to him?” “Because I saw him the other day and he literally started running away from me as soon as he saw me.” “For real? Where’d you see him?” “At the Langley Shopping Center when I was out trying to find an outfit for your party. I saw him at Elmore’s Department Store. He almost knocked down a whole display of purses trying to get away from me.” I had to fight hard not to laugh. “Damn, really? Maybe he was just in a hurry.” “I don’t think so. He had this crazy, panicked look on his face when he saw me, too. The same look I saw on his face at the movie theater that time.” “What time?” “The time he ran into those people and knocked them down.”

“That was your ex?” “You are such a bad actor.” I chuckled. “Baby, I’m not acting. I didn’t know that was him.” “And a bad liar.” “I’m insulted. You think I’m lying?” “I know you are. And the more I think about it, you probably paid the judge to sign off on my divorce so quickly. You did say you had a few on your payroll in Chicago. A man who can

get a video to an inmate can surely pay off a judge here in Tennessee, too.” Damn. She had really figured my ass out. I couldn’t think of anything to say. “What’d you do to him, Zo?” “Why are you asking about this now? Shouldn’t you be asleep?” “I can’t sleep. Still wired from the party, and it’s been on my mind for a few days

What’d you do to him?” “Does it matter? What difference does it make?” “I wanna know.” I sighed and eased her off my chest so that I could sit up in the bed. “Me and Rell just scared him, messed with his head a little bit. Told him to stop fuckin...

“Why? Because…shit, because I wanted you to be free so we could get together. And because he was breaking you down. I could see it at that benefit. You looked like you were being tortured.” “I was,” she said softly. “Yeah, well, that shit pissed me the hell off, and I couldn’t let him get away with it. I couldn’t let

did was wrong, and maybe it was, but if I had it to do all over again, I wouldn’t change a damn thing. That asshole deserved it. He deserved worse.

That’s right!

“Thanking you,” she said, and then slid me into her mouth again.

“Thank you, Zo.” Through heaving breaths, I said, “Marry me, Doc.” “Are you asking me to marry you because I just—” “No, no, I was going to ask you at the party tonight. I

had it all planned out but scrapped everything after Veda showed her ass. I have a ring and everything. Hold up.” My legs were kind of weak, but I managed to get up and find the tuxedo jacket I’d tossed on a chair in a corner and dug the ring out of the pocket. Then I turned on the lamp next to my side of the bed to see that she was crying.

“Yes?” She nodded. “Yes, I’ll marry you. But can we have a long engagement. Like a year?” “Whatever you want.” I slid the ring on her finger, and she kissed me again. “Thank you. Zo. For everything.” “No, baby. Thank you.”

“Thanks, Janine. And speaking of secrets, um…about you and Rell…” She actually gasped and then wore this shocked look on her face. I rolled my eyes. “Me and Lorenzo saw you leaving his place a few weeks ago. So, don’t try to deny it.” Janine was a dark-skinned beauty, but I swear she was blushing. “Renee…Tyrell, he’s so sweet and kind and

sexy. I’m-I’m crazy about him! At first, when I would see him out on the lot waiting for you, I thought he was your new man and girl, I was so jealous, because that’s one big fine teddy bear of a man to me! And now, he’s mine!” “Oh, Janine. I’m so happy for you. But, uh…how did you two…I mean, he doesn’t talk.” “Oh, we exchanged numbers one afternoon here out on the parking lot, and then we started texting, and he

writes me the sweetest letters. And…I just love him. I really do.” “Sounds like you might be getting a ring soon.” “I really hope so. I’d marry him in a heartbeat and move right into that garage apartment with him.” “You’d leave your house for him?” “Honey, yes! I’d leave ...

nodded and smiled again. “Yeah, I know.” *****

had no idea what he was talking about, so with tears crowding my eyes, I said the only thing I could think to say. “Zo, I can’t have children.

I’m-I’m unable to have children.”

The smile he was wearing before I spoke slowly faded. “Doc, what—” “I have a hormonal imbalance. I was a late bloomer, so to speak. Didn’t start my period until I was fifteen. They’re regular, but shorter than they should be. I’m-I’m sorry, Zo. I try so hard not to think about it because it’s painful for me, that I never mentioned it to you, but you deserve to know, so I’m

“Doc, it’s okay,” he said softly, but when I looked up at him, there was clear disappointment on his face. I shook my head and let my tears fall. “No, it’s not okay. I should’ve told you long before now. You’re disappointed. I can see it on your face.” I slid the ring off my finger and laid it on the table. “Here.”

Kneeling beside me, he rested a hand on my thigh. “Doc, look at me.” I shook my head. “Baby, look at me. Please.” I looked at him through watery eyes.

“My son.”

“My son. My oldest. Darwin.” I shifted my eyes from the smiling face on the profile picture to Lorenzo. There was definitely a resemblance… “You have a son, Zo?” He nodded. “I actually have three sons…and a daughter.” My stomach started to feel sour, and that headache suddenly

Zo, you have four kids?”

I would give anything to have a child and you act like yours don’t even exist!” “No—” “Oh, my God! What kind of fool am I to fall for a man like you?!” “Wait a minute, now. You need to calm down, Renee. It’s not like you didn’t keep anything from me! Did it slip your mind all these months that your ass couldn’t even have kids?!”

“Why did Mama have a feather hanging out of her ass?” Angie asked. “Hell, I don’t know! Maybe she was supposed to be a turkey or a chicken or a peacock or a cockatoo or a damn pigeon! You think I took the time to ask questions? I got the hell up out of there!!”

Lmao 😂

“Because I’m not doing it,” Rell said. Silence filled the room. Was I losing my damn mind? “I got your back, Zo, and

you know it. You’ve always been there for me and my family. Ain’t nothing I won’t do for you, but this? This is wrong, and I’m not doing it.” “Uh—”

“You love her. She loves you, and you need to get over yourself and fix this whole fear of losing people thing you have. You need to get over your abandonment issues. She was upset and she left, and then she came back. But all you can see is the fact that she left. People get mad, people leave, but people also come back! You’re fixated on the leaving part, and you’re only looking at half the picture. So, I’m not doing that. I’m not taking

that stuff to her, because someone has to save you from your own damn self!” “Nigga…you can talk?” I asked.

Placing my hand on her cheek, I turned her head so that her eyes met mine. “Baby, this love we have, it’s got a mind of its own. It’s wild and urgent and fucking

beautiful. It’s so strong and consuming and sometimes, I love you so much I feel like I’m gonna lose my mind, but I don’t want it to change. I want to be just as passionate about you in fifty years as I am today, but I have to admit it makes me a little crazy, and the thought of losing you…it’s too much for me. Way too much. That shit makes it hard for me to even breathe.”

“But for real, baby, you just gave me two unrelated reasons for your headache, and you’ve been getting them like every day. It might not be your blood pressure, but something is causing them. I’ma need you to go to the doctor.” I sighed. “I will.” “Tomorrow.”

was already out the door before she could respond. Once in the car, I gripped the steering wheel and tried to calm my breathing as I stared down at the photo lying in the passenger seat—a photo of Clarence Higgs and my father.

😳😳😳😳

see you found me,” he said, with a smile on his face. “I was beginning to wonder if you were going to make it.” I stood in the doorway, nodded, and asked, “You carrying?” “Of course I am. I see you are, too.” “Of course I am. You know who I am?” “Clarence Higgs’ boy. You look just like him. You know who I am?”

“The motherfucker who killed Clarence Higgs.” He straightened up in his chair, and I damn near shot him right then. “No, I didn’t kill your father. I know that’s always been the assumption because I saw him that night, but it’s untrue. Clarence was like a brother to me.” “That’s what a lot of people say right before they kill a nigga.” “But I’m telling the truth.”

don’t believe you.” “Lorenzo, I respected your father, would’ve never hurt him, and cried like a baby when I heard he’d been killed. Hell, his death is what got me to leave that life behind and concentrate on my car lots, because if someone as good as Clarence could be killed, I knew I didn’t stand a chance.” I stared at him. “He was a good man, and I know for a fact he loved you and tried to raise you right,

“What? I didn’t even know you were Jaywalk until last night. I’m not using her!” He leaned forward. “You think I’m that damn dumb?”