Writing Deep Viewpoint

by Kathy Tyers

Erica reached into the warm tub of popcorn and curled her fingers around a fat handful. Conversations hummed all around her, and smack in front of her sat a man wearing the tallest, broadest cowboy hat she ever saw. When he reached up and took it off, she glanced to her left. “Whew!” Her sister Kristin leaned close to whisper. “I was afraid we’d be looking through that for two hours.” “Me too.” Erica took another handful of popcorn and then held the tub out toward Kristin. “Want some more?”

might even argue that if the French press is going to be plot-vital, the breakfast

People react to things that they see, hear, or feel. They react after it happens. Scientists call this stimulus-response. Characters who live in convincing story time can only react to things they have already experienced. Often, new writers will describe a character’s reaction before showing the readers what caused it.

TELLING BY USING PASSIVE VERBS The day was warm and sunny. (Showing: Tessa dashed for the oak tree’s cool shade.) Professor Clark was plainly impatient. (Showing: Professor Clark stood at the front of the classroom, tapping a foot and frowning.) When she saw him standing there, she was alarmed. (Showing: There he stood. Her hands went cold.)

in deep viewpoint, undistracted and unconfused. Warning: Some word-processing software will automatically capitalize the first word you write after every question mark. Your computer thinks it’s smarter than you. Proofread carefully. Be sure to edit “What?” She cried. Instead, make it “What?” she cried.

“Give me a break,” she pleaded. (yes) “Whispering.” He muttered. “Won’t make you invisible.” (no, no) “Get off my lawn!” Shouted the irate homeowner. (no) “It’s such a beautiful day,” Jaine exclaimed. (yes) “Was that an earthquake?” asked Ned. (yes) “Give me five of those. Quickly,” Ordered the thief. (no) “That’s enough examples,” whispered Tom. (yes) “Okay. Then I’ll quit.” Said Kathy. (no)

SENSORY CLICHÉS In describing a setting, clichés also nudge the reader out of deep viewpoint. They make a person pause and think, “I’ve heard that before,” noticing your writing instead of staying involved in the story. the delicious scent of jasmine

SELF-EDITING CHECKLIST Here’s a list of issues that we covered in this book. Watch for them as you self-edit. Is the viewpoint clearly established at the top of each scene? (See Chapter 3)