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April 29, 2020 - July 30, 2021
If you want to know what’s really inside a person, listen carefully to the words she speaks.
C. S. Lewis said it best: “We are not necessarily doubting that God will do the best for us; we are wondering how painful the best will turn out to be.”
Live from the abundant place that you are loved, and you won’t find yourself begging others for scraps of love.
Giving with strings of secret expectations attached is the greatest invitation to heartbreak. That’s not love. That’s manipulation. And it’s all so unrealistic. Only audiences are trained to applaud performances. People in everyday life can sniff out the neediness of a performer trying to earn love. Their instinct isn’t to clap but rather to be repulsed by the fakeness of it all and walk away.
Do I walk into situations prepared with the fullness of God in me, free to look for ways to bless others? Or … Do I walk into situations empty and dependent on others to look for ways to bless me?
It’s time we prepare ourselves, right now, with the fullness of God. Before that next party. Before that next difficult discussion with our husbands or friends or neighbors. Before that next step we take in pursuing our dreams. Before that next hurt, hurdle, or heartbreak. We must get this settled in our hearts, minds, and souls.
People who care more about being right than ending right prove just how wrong they were all along. Lord, let me end this the right way.
“We are in this together, so let’s attack the problem, not each other.”
saying “me too” must come with three guidelines of what this is not meant to do: It is not a tactic we should use to steal the spotlight. It’s not saying, “Oh, me too. Now let’s process all my hurt.” It is not something we should use to one-up their hurt. It’s not saying, “Me, too, except if you think what you’re going through is difficult, let me show you what real difficulties are.” And lastly, it is not a validation of their actions that spring from their feelings. It’s simply acknowledging their feelings and identifying with them if you can authentically do that.
Acceptance is like an antibiotic that prevents past rejections from turning into present-day infections. The need for belonging runs deep.
No amount of outside achievement fixes inside hurts.
If we react with more emotion than is appropriate for an isolated incident, it’s probably not so isolated. The escalated emotion of this situation is probably an indication of painful ties to the past.
Anything that infuses us with humility is good. Even if it feels a bit like humiliation in the moment, the workings of humility within are a gift. The tweaking of us by God in the quiet is the saving of us in public. The only difference between humility and humiliation is that one chose to bow low while the other tripped and fell there. Either way, the sweetest grace lifted my face, and I saw that on the other side of the stripping of pride are some of the best gifts God gives us.
The Bible reminds us that on the other side of humility we find wisdom (Proverbs 11:2). We will be lifted up by God Himself in due time (1 Peter 5:6). “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble” (James 4:6 NLT). Humility isn’t a place of weakness but rather a position that will come with honor (Proverbs 18:12). And humility is an absolute requirement for those who ask God to heal their land (2 Chronicles 7:14).
The enemy loves to take our rejection and twist it into a raw, irrational fear that God really doesn’t have a good plan for us. This fear is a corrupting companion. It replaces the truths we’ve trusted with hopeless lies. Satan knows what consumes us controls us. Therefore the more consumed we are with rejection, the more he can control our emotions, our thinking, and our actions. That’s the exact place where panic starts to replace peace. Uncertainty starts to overshadow our faith. And discouragement threatens to override our joy.
“Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” (Luke 6:27–28 NASB
(PSALM 73:25–26)
Do not put the LORD your God to the test. (Deuteronomy 6:16)
Verses 13–15 remind us, “Fear the LORD your God, serve him only and take your oaths in his name. Do not follow other gods, the gods of the peoples around you;
for the LORD your God, who is among you, is a jealous God.”
He absolutely doesn’t want us making other relationships the false gods of our worship.
We just have to remember that where we pay attention matters more than we know. Our minds and hearts are like dry sponges. What we focus on is what will soak in and saturate us. If it is something foolish, we will make foolish decisions. If it is wise, we will make wise decisions.
If we pay attention to foolish things or things that fuel foolishness in us, we will bankrupt our perspective. And we will be more likely to fall prey to Satan’s schemes. Satan’s schemes are well-thought-through plans specifically targeted at our particular weakness to do three things: To increase our desire for something outside the will of God To make us think giving in to a weakness is no big deal To minimize our ability to think through the consequences of falling to this temptation
You are more susceptible to Satan’s schemes when you are feeling rejected. Emotional pain will scream for relief, and it’s so easy to start justifying thoughts and actions outside God’s will.
Don’t get so consumed by and focused on the mess—the feelings of rejection, hurt, and disillusionment—that you miss the miracle.
Access without application will not equal transformation.
We can go to Bible study and amen every point made, but if we don’t apply it to our lives, we won’t be changed. And I’ll even take it a step further and say that if we’ve been exposed to a teaching that we know we need to implement and we don’t make any changes, that’s a clue that the hardening of that part of our heart is in process. Inspiration and information without personal application will never amount to transformation.
Because the need to be loved and accepted runs so deep, we find ourselves doing things we never thought possible just to try to satisfy those desires. What starts off as a seemingly small compromise can easily become a complete contradiction to the people we long to be. We set things in motion that we never intended, all because we missed the miracle of His presence and promise in the midst of the mess.
