For the Love: Fighting for Grace in a World of Impossible Standards

by Jen Hatmaker

Finally, let’s give them substance. When young adults between ages eighteen and thirty-five were polled nationwide and asked, “What would draw you or keep you at a church?” they listed the following four tenets: 1.) community, 2.) social justice, 3.) depth, and 4.) mentorship.3 A youth group culture geared toward entertainment is not working. Face it: We cannot out-entertain the world. If discipleship programs hinge on amusement, they’ll come now but won’t stay later. Why would they? Believe it or not, kids crave depth. They want to grapple with theology. They are malnourished from too much spiritual soda pop, and they want wine. By attempting to attract them with cultural relevance, the church accidentally became irrelevant—like when parents try to be cool. Turns out they don’t want their parents to be cool. They just want them to be parents who don’t woo their loyalty and coddle their feelings. Real parents say, “Get out of bed and do your chores.” Because they are preparing their kids to grow up one day. Let’s give them the goods. Let’s put the hard stuff in front of them. We shouldn’t patronize their intelligence because kids are absolutely capable of spiritual depth. Let’s teach them to serve and care about the world beyond their Xboxes. And we have to lead with our lives, not just our lips, because kids can smell a fake. Our sincerity is so crucial, we shouldn’t lead like this if we are unwilling to go first. Better to be entirely apathetic than blatantly hypocritica...