More on this book
Community
Kindle Notes & Highlights
“Do you … do you have to go?” Jack asked quietly. “It’s a Friday night…” August just stood silently, door wide open. “I should say no to you,” he said after some time. Jack waited. Finally, August got back in the car.
When they got out of the car, August put his hand on the back of Jack’s neck and rubbed his thumb gently on the top of his spine.
“Busy doing what? Selling drugs?” she shot back. “Bite me!” he shouted.
“This is the gayest thing I’ve ever done,” he said darkly. Jack snorted. “No. It’s not. Remember in fourth grade, when Danny Sader let you—” “I will literally throw you out the window.”
“Stob bitchig,” he said quietly. “You’re basically like my brudder. Iss nod a big deal.” August thought about that awhile. “Yeah,” he finally replied, but Jack was already asleep.
“No … no. It’s not that. I was just worried about something.” “Worried about … me?” “Well, yeah.” “Oh.” Jack sat there for a while. “I like it,” he admitted. “You can keep doing it if you’d like.” “Doing what? The staring or the worrying?” Jack just smiled and unpaused the game.
“You can’t just die so stupidly,” he’d hissed. “I need you. You’re mine.”
alright
August sniffled and gripped the pillow hard, the tips of his ears going red. “Are you crying?” Jack asked softly. “Shut up.”
“August,” Jack whispered. He lay very still with an indescribable look on his face, his eyes gently pressed shut.
He wiped and pricked and wiped and pricked until the very last. Then, without thinking at all, he bowed his head against Jack’s side and closed his eyes. Jack pushed his fingers through August’s thick hair and gripped hard.
“Are you seeing things now?” “Yes.” “What?” “You.” August closed his eyes.
“Fine,” Jack growled, inches from his ear. “This is your game, August. I’ll play along while you make the rules. But don’t you ever, ever hit me again.”
wtf
Does everyone have a friend like this?
no. the answer is no :(
“Should we get something to eat?” “Huh?” Jack laughed. “I feel like I’m on a date.”
“Would it be too cliché for us to have a snowball fight?” August asked, grinning. “I would rather die than let you get the seats of my car wet,” Jack replied dryly.
He fell asleep with Gordie curled around him on one side and Jack’s head nestled on his stomach.
I have a bad feeling about Gordie lol
All virtues not granted at birth are taught to you by life, one way or another. My mother told me that.”
Jack tilted his head back. August laughed nervously as he tied his friend’s bow tie. It was soft. The moment was soft.
Across the room, Jack watched.
“Get out of my car.” “No!” “Get the fuck out of my car!” Jack shouted.
WTF
He’d seen Jack fall and sprinted toward the pit; August had leaped off the edge and dove headlong into the darkness behind him. He would pull them both out of the deep with his bare hands. It was the debt. The river. It was his religion now. And such a thing was worth more than the mountains and the seas.
“I was just scared,” Jack whispered. “I know.” He wiped a tear from Jack’s cheek, smearing his face with ash. “Don’t leave me.” August shut his eyes. “I won’t.”
August curled toward him, and Jack grabbed August’s jacket, pulling him closer. He rested his forehead against August’s.
“I see you the same. I don’t think it will ever change.… It doesn’t matter if you’re wearing my colors or dressed like this. You’re always just you.”
Jack loosened his grip and peered at him curiously. “Sometimes I don’t understand you, August. You’re very bold.”
WTF
The world was so big and they were very small and there was no one around to stop terrible things from happening.
“It’s fine. It’s nothing. Go back to sleep,” August mumbled, embarrassed. Jack sighed and reached over, gripping the back of August’s neck firmly in his hand. The tension instantly bled from August’s bones and he breathed out softly. “We’ll stop in an hour.”
August frowned warily but sat still while Jack rubbed his face with the ball of his thumb. “Christ, you’re such a child,” Jack muttered.
“Did he come?” August asked. Jack sobbed. August put his shoes and coat on and went out into the cold.
“I wish you could live here with me.” It was almost a whisper.
Before they could reach the water, Jack slipped his hand into August’s. He did it without asking. With confidence. Like it was meant to be there.
Jack pulled him in almost to his chest, then rested his head in the curve of August’s neck. “What would you do for me?”
“No! No, wait, I didn’t mean it like that. I just—” Jack reached out to pull him back, but August shrugged him off roughly and stalked toward the door. “August.” August stopped, his hand on the doorknob. “I didn’t mean … I mean … don’t leave. Please.”
“You seem happier than usual,” Jack said. “I’m actively frowning, Jack.”
“I broke up with Gordie.” Jack looked way too excited about that information.
It’s not as bad as it seems. And when that fails, I just follow him.” He gestured at August.
“It’s not weak. My mom once told me that being alone makes you feel weaker every day, even if you’re not,” he said quietly. “But it’s not as bad if you’re with other people who are alone, too. We can hold each other up like a card tower.”
He toed off his Chucks and collapsed to the floor, curling up next to August’s knees.
“Do what you want. You know who you belong to.”
“You love him.” It wasn’t said like a question.
“Come on, August. I can’t lose you, I can’t—”
“Sometimes … you have to stop trying and just let someone else try their best. In order to survive.”
August sat up suddenly and gripped Jack’s forearm. “I am doing this for you. Not the Wicker King. Not what we have become. But for you. If anything goes wrong, I want you to remember that.”
Jack curled around him, pressing their foreheads together in sorrow. They breathed the same air. So close but not touching. Never touching.
“You’re going to die,” Jack gasped shakily. He sounded scared again.
Jack laid his head back onto August’s leg, and August weakly dropped his hand onto Jack’s cheek. He closed his eyes again, drowning in the black. “I’m sorry.” “Don’t be.”
Jack laughed. “How romantic. My knight in shining fucking armor.”
“You burn things all the time these days,” Jack said softly. “Would you burn for me?”
“You already know I’ll do it,” August said. You already know. You fucking know.
August buried his face in Jack’s chest, curling in against him to hide from the heat of the flames. Jack held him just as tight, fingers digging into his shoulders, his arms wrapping around August’s waist, clutching at his hair. August didn’t realize he was crying until his sobs began to choke him. “Is it over? Is it over? Is it over?”
