High Performance Habits: How Extraordinary People Become That Way

by Brendon Burchard

people think of courage as a human virtue that some have and others don’t. But that’s incorrect. Courage is more like a skill, since anyone can learn it.

You are capable of remarkable things that you could never foretell and will never discover without taking action.

A high performer faced doubt or fear or suddenly rose in service to help someone. They didn’t “have” courage or find it through contemplation. Action woke their heart, and their path was revealed.

When we learn to see struggle as a necessary, important, and positive part of our journey, then we can find true peace and personal power.

the ultimate message in times of difficulty: to have faith in yourself and the future.

Do not dare play small, my friend. Do not feel guilt because you have high aims. Those dreams were seeded in your soul for a reason, and it is your duty to honor them.

there’s nothing humble in saying, “I’d better not shine, because the timid souls around me couldn’t handle it.” Please.

which is nobler: falling dutifully in line with what everyone wants, or speaking up for what’s right for you? Ultimately, you must ask which your life is about: fear or freedom? One choice is the cage. The other—that’s courage.

Each day, reveal to others a little bit more of what you’re thinking, feeling, dreaming

We will do more for others than for ourselves. And in doing something for others, we find our reason for courage, and our cause for focus and excellence.

“I want to leave a legacy, so I decided to get out of my own way and go for it.”

HIGH PERFORMANCE KILLERS BEWARE THREE TRAPS “The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars but in ourselves.” —William Shakespeare, Julius Caesar BEWARE SUPERIORITY BEWARE DISSATISFACTION BEWARE NEGLECT

The roots of superiority always begin to grow in the soil of separateness and certainty. It’s that moment when you begin to think you are separate from others, or certain about anything, that you are in greatest danger.

All isolation is ultimately self-imposed.

lack of understanding only grows in your silence.

I’ve rarely met a high performer who thinks they’re “at the top.” Most feel like they’re just getting started.

You can’t maximize your potential while minimizing others. What you have attained in life isn’t because you’re all that special, but because you’re all that blessed.

In almost all studies on expert performance, the major thing that made the difference was not a person’s innate talents, but the hours of exposure and deliberate practice.

Superior-minded people are certain they are better, more capable, more deserving.4 And it’s that certainty that closes their minds to learning, connection with others, and, ultimately, growth.

Humility is a foundational virtue that enables many other virtues to grow. It is associated with positive outcomes like marital fidelity, cooperation, compassion for others, strong social bonds, general group acceptance, optimism, hope, decisiveness, comfort with ambiguity, and openness to experience.

To avoid thinking you’re superior to others, deliberately seek others’ ideas for improving anything you do: If you could improve on my idea, how would you go about it?

Consistency in receiving feedback is the hallmark of consistent growth.

people can perceive you to be superior minded when you don’t engage with them, even if it’s not your true intent or spirit.

too often we give credit to the forefront negative emotions and experiences in life and miss the real causes of success.

Don’t just hope to arrive somewhere someday and finally feel satisfied. Strive satisfied.

Slow down, be more strategic, and say no more often.

I encourage all high performers who want to keep rising to say no to almost every opportunity in their mind first, then force themselves to justify it before ever giving a yes. “Yes” got you into the game. Taking on a lot and pursuing a lot of interests helped you figure out your “thing.” But now that you’re succeeding, more yeses can start hurting you. “No” keeps you focused.

If the new thing you want to commit to doesn’t strategically move you toward your end goals, it must be delayed. Most opportunities in life that are really worthwhile and meaningful will still be here six months from now.

You already know what to say, so now it’s just about who you want to be out there and how you want to connect.

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nothing we’ve found correlates with high performance scores across the board more than confidence. Confidence is the secret ingredient that makes you rise to the challenge.

confidence came from purposeful thinking and action.

the more competence you get at any given task, the more confident you’ll become in trying it more often—and the more you’ll stretch yourself. That repetition and stretching leads to more learning, which gives you more competence. More competence, then, begets more confidence, and round and round it goes.

High performers are learners, and their belief that they can learn what is necessary to win in the future gives them as much confidence as their current skill sets.

High performers ponder the lessons from their wins. They give credit to themselves, and they allow those wins to integrate into their psyche and give them greater strength.

At some point—often a major moment in their lives—they took control, defined who they wanted to be, and started living in accordance with that self-image. They shaped their identity by conscious will and have aligned their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors to support that identity.

“You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.” —Dale Carnegie

high performers love to develop influence with others. They enjoy connecting with people and learning how they think, what challenges they face, and what they are trying to stand for in this world.

What matters is this: “Do you want to learn from others? Will you take the time to do it? Will you genuinely try to engage someone and learn about how they think, what they need, what they stand for?”

High performers’ confidence, then, comes from a mindset that says, “I know I’ll do well with others because I’ll be genuinely interested in them because I want to learn.”

As you reflect on these three confidence builders—competence, congruence, and connection—perhaps you’ve noticed an underlying theme. What drove the development for high performers in each of these areas was curiosity.

Curiosity x (Competence + Congruence + Connection) = Confidence

Seek clarity on who you want to be, how you want to interact with others, and what will bring meaning into your life. Generate energy so you can sustain focus, effort, and well-being. To stay on your A game, you’ll need to care actively for your mental stamina, physical energy, and positive emotions. Raise the necessity of your level of performance. This means actively tapping into the reasons you must perform well, based on a mix of your internal standards (e.g., your identity, beliefs, values, or expectations for excellence) and external demands (e.g., social obligations, competition, public commitments). Increase productivity in your primary field of interest. Specifically, you’ll need to focus on “prolific quality output” (PQO) in the area in which you want to be known and to drive impact. You’ll also have to minimize distractions (or opportunities) that steal your attention from creating PQO. Develop influence with those around you so you can get them to believe in and support your efforts and ambitions. Without a positive support network, major achievements over the long haul are all but impossible. Demonstrate courage by expressing your ideas, taking bold action, and standing up for yourself and others even in the face of fear, uncertainty, or changing conditions.

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