Selfie: How the West Became Self-Obsessed

by Will Storr

I’ve no doubt it is common. Perhaps it’s because it (not quite accurately) implies a level of self-pity, and self-pity is a quality that’s uniquely unattractive. The feeling of angry repulsion it can inspire when we come across it in others is surely telling. Our storytelling brains want the selves it meets to act as heroes, optimistically rising to the challenges of life. When they encounter the opposite, they react viscerally, as if they’ve come across something infectious. But this is a problem. When people feel suicidal it often comes with feelings of self-loathing and, because of this cultural taboo, we don’t want to admit them. We certainly don’t want to talk about it to anyone, especially if we’re prone to perfectionistic thinking and a heightened sensitivity to signals of failure. The way we feel about ourselves is shameful. And in the silence that’s pushed upon us, that shame and self-loathing grow. It seems to me that self-loathing is